SRK Tier Discussion OS XII

General Discussion
281

Huzzah! Thank you Bowling Pin, for voting for Santa, even if it was out of spite for Mentos (which I also hate).

When it came trying to debate the physics of Santa, I didn’t think anyone was trying to get that serious. I mean, you obviously were but I didn’t want to complicate Santa with talk about temporal distortion. At the very least, no one disputes that Santa is able to visit millions of homes on a single night. At the very least, no one disagrees that Santa accomplishes this task by traveling at an amazing speed. The sheer force that is generated by this high-speed travel means that Santa’s body is on a completely different level.

Let’s say that the reindeer are an assist and are what allows Santa to move that fast. Let’s say the it’s the reindeer that are moving at light speed. How does Santa’s body survive the trip? How is he laughing all the way?

At the very least, no one disagrees that Santa can slide down a chimney of any size. No one disputes that Santa is a fat jolly white man with an Epic Beard. So, how does Santa get down the chimney? The properties of Santa’s body are on another level, clearly.

Also, consider this: What if Santa has to visit a house that lacks a chimney? How does Santa get inside? Certainly, Santa does not skip over a house that has people in it who have been nice all year and written Santa letters. Santa doesn’t break a window to get in. Santa doesn’t bust down the front door. Santa would never damage your house. This implies that Santa is able to employ some form of teleportation, or, that Santa is able to squeeze and contort his body through the smallest possible entry to a Christmas-celebrating home without causing damage to the property. Further, aside from being able to shape shift/teleport his own body, how does Santa bend and shape the associated presents?

How about this conundrum. Something for the S.H.I.T. voters to consider: There is a solid steel square box welded shut with a battery-powered Christmas tree inside it. A child who has been good all year writes a letter to Santa and places the tree inside the completely sealed solid steel box on December 23rd. Let’s say the hypothetical good kid asked Santa for an Xbox 360. The kid goes to sleep on Christmas Eve and wakes up on Christmas morning. When the solid steel box is welded open on Christmas morning, will he find the Xbox 360 under the tree?

If the answer is “yes”, Santa can either teleport, or Santa can pass through solid matter.

This is yet another thing to consider when casting a fair vote for Santa.

282

What I’m afraid might happen with the tiers is that a lot of the old guard are very exclusive. I don’t want it to become an old boy’s club where we refuse to let anyone enter and play with our toys. Granted, the tiers are exclusive in its very nature - we only accept the best of the best here. But I don’t want us to have all the fun to ourselves if people try their hardest to make some convincing arguments.

With that in mind, I had a few general thoughts. I don’t think that being black eliminates you from entering the tiers. Sure, it’s very hard - the white man has done an extremely good job at keeping colored folk down - but there are a few minorities who have overcome white prejudice. Even racist white folk love Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson. Shit, Tiger Woods was the fuckin’ man at GOLF. GOLF, people. And then there’s Obama. White folk hate him, but he’s still the leader of the free world. Kind of.

Sure, this means that any black character entering the tiers has to either be a legendary superstar celebrity or possess unimaginable wealth… but you get the drift. Remember, MacGyver himself can tap into Unbridled Negro Rage*, so surely there are brothas out there who possess The White Burden.

*There was an episode where MacGyver went to visit his Black Best Friend who ran a YMCA in the ghetto. (lol) His friend was killed by the Klan, and in response, MacG went into their Klan Kave and beasted the ever living shit out of every white hood in a five mile radius… without prepping shit. Seriously. He didn’t even need a paperclip, rubber band and a bottle of ethanol; he just strolled in there and fucked whitey’s shit up. Unbridled Negro Rage, gentlemen.

283

I didn’t come up with the “no black people” rule, and I don’t support it. In the beginning, I just followed the rules they told me about.

I’m up for altering it to “only black people that can prove resistance to po-leece, fried chicken, and white women”, if that makes it less racist.

As far as becoming too exclusive for anyone to participate, I don’t feel that’s happening at all. There are two nominations this time around that I definitely support, and a few more that I’d change my mind on given the right evidence.

Like you said, it is supposed to be exclusive, since not everyone can be top tier. The trick is to not shut down every nomination.

But just as in science, you don’t set out trying to prove the hypothesis. You try to disprove it.

Our job is not to find all the ways a character is top tier. Our job is to find all the ways that character is not top tier. If we can’t do our job, the character gets in. If we place enough doubt on his abilities, he doesn’t.

It’s simple, and it’s fair. The way to get into S.H.I.T. is to nominate a character we can’t turn down. In doing so, you prove that you understand the rules of tiering and earn your membership, as well as the right to vote on future nominations.

And it’s fun to argue.

284

Well, guess I could try.

First off, this is Ivan. Now before you say “Knee to groin”, we haven’t taken into account Ivan’s other and truly broken form. I think EmblemLord and a few other’s said it better than I ever can.

Now, what this means is no character can ever combo Ivan Ooze. Ever. He’ll just get out of hitstun, use his invincibilty shield, lock them down and stay invincible the whole match. Goodbye CR Fierce, goodbye ST Akuma, goodbye anyone.

Now weaknesses.
Reading through this thread, I see that a nomination must have anti-pussy. Ivan Ooze is a fuckin purple monster who wants to destroy and doesn’t care about anything else, I say that’s antipussy. I see that they need to also get past Batman in some way. Batman has no way of hitting Ivan like everyone else. Hopefully I got everything, but if I miss something I’ll hit it in the afternoon.

285

So it’s gotta be in a movie/TV show? Jesus Christ, that just ruined my shoe-in character. There’s no way he would get denied for top tier and that just fucking ruined it.:shake:

286

Normal batman isn’t relevant. preptime batman, whether he’s depressed or not has all his bases coevered.

Look it’s not about S.H.I.T being an old boys club lol’ing at everyone else, this is one of the few interesting and timeless pieces on srk. Our tier thread isn’t like other ones where 12 yr olds come in shouting about goku and pre-crisis sups, we have our own criteria, largely grounded in humour and randomness (santa win) but ultimately the entrants into the top tier have to be able to kick ass (santa fail, he’s a fat elderly postman) and no exploitable weaknesses (santa fail for reasons already mentioned). Preptime batman and FTF§ cable are the perfect way to filter applicants.

It’s not supposed to be easy to get someone past PT Bats, that’s the point, and why the thread is timeless. It’s a difficult yet satisfying conundrum to get past PT Bats with all the srk established caviats (dip etc). Some of you guys seem to feel shortchanged that at 6 pages in (on my browser setup) noone new has been added. its not meant to be easy.

Anyway to spice things up, nobody ever refuted my assertion that macgyver is weak vs Ninjas. Its commonly known here that he can escape any situation with no prep, however this is FALSE. He was bested by a Ninja in the TV series and would have died were he not rescued by a 3rd party (assist).

Also i was out of the loop, have rollback guy and nutrigrain bar ever displayed the ability to fuck shit up?

287

First off, I totally agree about weakening the anti-black rules. That is a legacy rule that I think needs a change.

Mullah: Rollback Guy can lower any quantity. Even with infinite prep, Batman is fucked when his IQ gets rolled back to 7 and he can’t even remember his plans, the number of traps he set up in advance get rolled back to zero, and the Wayne fortune gets rolled back to $3.75. Rollback guy can then roll back the number of seconds Batman has left to live to 3. GGPO. I don’t remember NBG’s argument exactly, but I believe by making eye contact with Batman, he can brainwash him.

My votes:
Mayhem “Like me.” (Tanion)-


Yes

. Best argument made so far and fully support this character. Should be placed somewhere betwee c.FP and Rollback Guy in the tiers.

The Man Your Man Could Smell Like (BlueNu)-


Yes.

Changing my vote. to yes. The combined power of the current version + Terry Crews version + Ray Lewis version makes me believe he is powerful enough to defeat PT-Bats, evade the cops, and disregard bitches. At least 2 of those version have like 0.2% body fat, so I don’t see fried chicken as a problem either.

**Most Interesting Man in the World (Infernoman)-**No. Despite awesome beard-of-power, he has pretty low anti-pussy, and being interesting does not mean being powerful.

**Terry Tate (BullDancer)-**No. Tackling is not that special. Anyone can tackle. Pikachu can tackle.

**Kenny McCormick/Mysterion (TheEvilChinaMan)-**No. Even if he can die infinitely, I don’t see how he could ever kill Bats.

**Oprah (kz0060)-**No. I shouldn’t even have to explain this.

**Michael Angelo (ShinAkumax)-**No. I don’t even know who the fuck this is.

**Bittorent (catchafire)-**No. No information given, and as ubiquitous as bittorrent is, it’s so goddamn slow that Speedy Gonzales’ retarded cousin has a speed advantage.

**Beast (Muff Daddy)-**No. Detailed earlier. Lacks strong offense.

**Segata Sanshiro (Wellman)-**No. Not enough information at this time. I love the idea and would seriously consider if given appropriate evidence.

**Terry Crews (Silent Shinobi)-**No. Now part of “The Man Your Man Could Smell Like.”

Mr. Magoo (Omega Viscant aka Quiche)-


Yes

but technically I abstain. I nominated him so I can’t vote.

**Christopher Chance (Valaris)-**No. No info given.

**7-11 Big Gulp (BullDancer)-**No. High-Fructose Tier at best.

**Triple Dog Dare (Shodokan123)-**No. Not alive. TDD is a tool, which is not eligible to be tiered.

**NBA on NBC theme (Muff Daddy)-**No. It’s a song.

**O Fortuna (Tanion)-**No. It’s also a song

**Ride of the Valkyries (Infernoman)-**No. It’s a fucking song.

**Geico Commercial Guy (Pertho)-**No. He only states the obvious. He does not actually change the world.

**Final Destination Death (TheEvilChinaMan)-**No. Not alive.

**Sun (SRKev)-**No. Not alive, weak to koopa shells, and is always in Philadelphia.

**Schrodinger’s Cat (TheEvilChinaMan)-**No. I liked this idea until I remembered the vial of poison. Sadly, the cat is undead at best. A dead normal cat at worst.

**NSNTP Panda (Syke1)-**No. Knocking shit off tables and stomping on groceries does not constitute a strong offense. The teleportation/paralysis might be enough if you can show me that he can do that when cheese is not present.

**Mufasa’s Ghost (Syke1)-**No. Stirring motivational speeches in Darth Vader’s voice are cool, but I don’t see how inspiring Batman could hurt him.

**Santa Claus (Muff Daddy)-**No. God is already on the tiers, and let’s face it, Santa is God’s stooge. If you work for someone else, you’re not tierable imo. Also weakness to clumsiness, halloween kids, and Jews.

**Michael Jackson (Endless)-**No. Loses to fire, drugs, plastic surgery, and children.

**Emma Frost (Torrie De Goddess)-**No. X-gene suppression.

**Conrad Murray (Bowling Pin)-**No. Nomination withdrawn by BP.

**Steven Seagal (Yumi Saotome)-**No. At best he belongs in random tier w/ Vin Diesel & Chuck Norris.

**Ivan Ooze (Bious)-**No. As broken as he was in the power rangers video game, he was lame as fuck in the Power Rangers movie. Didn’t he die from being kicked in the crotch by Megazord?

…seriously.

288

Fuck Chris Chance. I don’t have the will or the creativity to argue for him.

289

Regarding my nomination for Old Spice guy- I have been crazy busy at work, so I haven’t had much time to post anything meaningful about this, but hear me out.

Lacks Anti-Pussy
There are a number of people who have pointed out that OSG lacks anti-pussy, or that he will do any number of things for women. What people have forgotten is that the pussy weakness principle is founded upon giving a shit about a particular pussy. Originally, it was suggested that PTB could simply kidnap a woman that your character was emotionally attached to and that you would be forced to concede. This is not how OSG operates. He demonstrates that he has the ability to acquire any pussy at any time, but shows no lack of judgement regarding pussy, and no emotional attachment to any pussy. All members of the god tier have displayed that they enjoy pussy as well at some point, but that isn’t the pussy weakness.

Lacks Offensive Capabilities
[media=youtube]GTjbLEvDhvE&feature=channel[/media]
The man possesses super stamina and super strength.

[media=youtube]owGykVbfgUE[/media]
The man possesses the ability to change matter into any form he pleases on a whim. He has the ability to teleport seamlessly- from a shower, to a boat, to a horse that he willed into existence. In a one on one fight, PT Bats couldn’t touch his physical abilities and would have to resort to trap laying- but bombs, anti-man spray, whatever batman could dream up would turn effortlessly into diamonds, soap, tickets, oysters or whatever OSG could dream up.

290

Ok I’m totally buying Old Spice Guy now. Show me how he resists the poleece, fried chicken, and white women, and he has my vote.

…seriously.

291

Ender - I will provide some more evidence for Most Interesting Man later today.

292

I watched some of Old Spice Guy’s tweet answers on youtube.

Doesn’t lose to pirates or ninjas:
[media=youtube]oaME8FQYxB8&feature=channel[/media]
Super healing ability:
[media=youtube]00SX-4oppd0&NR=1[/media]
Super painting ability that explodes your eyes and catches you on fire:
[media=youtube]p9x4OGtRro4&feature=channel[/media]
The Bat Cave has jack shit on OSG:
[media=youtube]hSXoihgnli8&feature=channel[/media]

The only weakness I can find is that he keeps a “heart ledger”, and apparently it’s a ranking tool, since he placed two ladies both #1 in it. But, he didn’t seem to give much thought to placing them #1, and I’m sure that whatever lady he’s currently trying to spice will hold first place, making it impossible for Bats to kidnap someone he truly cares about.
[media=youtube]xJup2gLOsC8&feature=channel[/media]

I’ll support him.

However, I think we should look into combining all the recent Old Spice spokesmen into one entity, since they all seem to be the same thing (big overpowered black dudes trying to smell nice).

Terry Crews fucking shit up:
[media=youtube]HdTHycsmqao&feature=fvst[/media]

Ray Lewis, NFL Superperson:
[media=youtube]sxqlw3cKZHA[/media]
[media=youtube]bnLN6DuHXPQ&NR=1[/media]
[media=youtube]ZYAsAdjTGrw&NR=1[/media]

Unbridled Negro Promotion.

293

Old Spice guy is not resistant to white women, he dates one.

[media=youtube]U5Y7MZV_bD0&feature=channel"[/media]

The Ray Lewis version would be a more proper candidate, but as shown in the commercials, [media=youtube]ZYAsAdjTGrw&feature=channel"[/media] itself. So it would need to be “Old Spiced Ray Lewis”.

Terry Crews wouldn’t be suitable either, because he’s incredibly weak to white chicks, as seen in the movie, White Chicks.

294

Just because the dude has game doesn’t mean that he is suddenly susceptible to pussy. Weak arguement against old spice guy.

295

Ok, combining all the Old Spice guys into one seems like a fantastic thing. He can fly in on his raven rocket, building-kick your shit into an armpit vortex, and then turn your bloody remains into diamonds.

I’m changing my vote, but on the condition that since we already have “Rollback Guy” and “Nutri-Grain Bar Guy” that instead of “Old Spice Guy” we from here on call him “The Man Your Man Could Smell Like”

…seriously.

EDIT

296

I’m not trying to hate on the guy, but [media=youtube]s5KIYhXa_8E"[/media]. Going through that much hassle for a married woman is definitely showing susceptibility to pussy. Plain and simple.

297

You gotta remember, because of the powers described, she would only be married so long as reality does not change for him wanting to hit it. Essentially him wanting to bang a chick is like fighting kenshiro: She doesn’t know it, but she already came. :cool:

298

He was winning that fight till he got kicked, and even then it took a comet hitting him to kill him.

By the way, could I seperate MMPR:FE Ivan Ooze from the rest of the Ivan Oozes then?

299

You probably could, but I doubt anyone would care. No one played MMPR:FE, so getting past the “giving a shit” barrier is going to be pretty tough. Especially since we already have a few characters on the tiers based on being broken in fighting games (Sagat, ST Akuma). That gimmick has been done.

…seriously.

300

Yeah… It’d be pretty boring if he was on there just cause he’s another broken character. Forget Ooze then.