Bugs_bunny.gif keeps looking better and better: Florida thread

Rhio2k · December 2, 2013, 12:44am

I’m willing to bet like in the previous incident(s), this girl beat the hell out of the door instead of just knocking. That same shit almost got ME shot back when I was 11 when my family was living in the projects. Luckily my dad had better sense than to shoot through the door, but when he opened it he had the gun ready. And that was when my parents telling me to just use my knuckles, and not EX Hammerfist doors suddenly made perfect sense.

Shin_Jr · December 2, 2013, 1:12am

hmm…

d3v · December 4, 2013, 10:30pm

A Florida State fan who police say tried to come to the aid of a woman involved in an altercation inside a Gainesville bar Saturday was arrested after police say he began threatening people with a machete.

The incident was quelled by an out-of-town police officer in FSU garb who managed to calm the man.

Brant W. Brown, 37, identified by Gainesville Police as an intoxicated FSU fan, went up to a man and woman arguing inside the EndZone Bar and Grill, 1209 W University Ave.,

and invited the man outside to fight, according to a report.

Several Gator fan bystanders stopped Brown, who invited all of the Gator fans to meet him outside in the parking lot, the report said.

Brown went outside, followed by the manager, who was calling 911 and giving police Brown’s description. Brown got a machete from his truck then threatened and charged at the manager, who retreated.

The woman in the original altercation went into the lot and Brown then threatened her with the machete, the report said. Brown covered the tag on his truck and fled on Alligator Alley, police said.

He stopped behind Mother’s Pub & Grill at 1017 W University Ave. and got out brandishing the machete. An off-duty Pembroke Pines police officer wearing an FSU shirt was able to calm Brown before Gainesville police arrived and arrested him.

Brown was arrested on charges of aggravated assault, resisting arrest, possession of marijuana and possession of drug paraphernalia.

Missing_Person · December 5, 2013, 8:23pm

About 24 hours after being released from the Marion County Jail, where he served time for stealing from Walmart, a man was re-arrested early Wednesday.

The new charge: retail grand theft from the same store.

Ocala police officer David Moorehead was patrolling at the Walmart at 4980 E. Silver Springs Blvd. when he saw Jeffrey Clinton Foss, 50, riding a bicycle with no lights in the parking lot. Officer Joshua Fried arrived, and he and Moorehead stopped Foss. A store employee told them Foss had thrown something next to a fence just before they stopped him.

Officers found the dropped item, a pillowcase with multiple items inside, a store tag from the bicycle Foss was riding and a Dickie’s jacket. Foss denied taking anything from the store.

Officers reviewed surveillance video, which showed Foss entering the store and taking numerous items from shelves, removing the bicycle and leaving the building without paying for any of the goods, valued at $461.58.

Foss was charged at 1:12 a.m. Wednesday with retail grand theft and was taken to the jail.

Court records show he had been arrested Jan. 16 for retail grand theft at the same store. On July 1, the charge was reduced to grand theft and Foss was adjudicated guilty. He was released from the jail at 10:01 a.m. Tuesday.

Saitsu · December 6, 2013, 1:31am

Oh Florida…

crotchpuncha · December 6, 2013, 3:03am

That’s terrible and hilarious at the same time.

Saitsu · December 6, 2013, 3:10am

The worst part is the movie doesn’t even look very good lol.

D.R.E · December 7, 2013, 5:57am

I alwaysa wanted to visit Miami for half nekkid bitches and sun and shit…

but this thread has me scared to go…I dun wanna catch thier stupid

d3v · December 9, 2013, 12:30pm

A Florida man convinced that someone had cast a voodoo spell on him filed a police report last month so that he could have documentation of the curse, just in case. And it appears these types of calls are fairly common in the Sunshine State.

According to the police report, the man “seemed normal at the time of the investigation,” when he told police that Haitian community members, jealous of him, had cast a spell designed to steal personal information from him.

Although the man felt the curse had been in place for at least a year, he has not yet suffered any ill effects, according to the police report.

These types of calls are apparently common in Florida, mostly in the Haitian community. In Delray Beach, where 10 percent of the community is Haitian, police “occasionally get calls from Haitian residents fearing supernatural death threats and curses.” According to the Sun Sentinel, the “department takes a report and leaves it at that.”

http://gawker.com/florida-man-files-police-report-over-voodoo-curse-1479320844/

Rhio2k · December 9, 2013, 4:16pm

Don’t worry, just don’t drink from the tap, and only drink purified-distilled water while you’re here. None of that Dasani or Zephyrhills shit. That’s packaged tap water. Crazy in a bottle.

d3v · December 9, 2013, 4:46pm

People drink water in Miami? I thought the people there subsisted purely on cocaine.

Missing_Person · December 9, 2013, 5:00pm

I think a WTF button is too weak. We need a “Florida” button for crazy stuff on SRK.

d3v · December 9, 2013, 8:58pm

Only if it comes with this GIF and a voice clip of Shatner screaming FLORIDAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/shatner-khan.gif

Raz0r · December 10, 2013, 3:39am

Too late.

Gravity · December 10, 2013, 8:34am

Well the kids were bound to find out the truth about the stork eventually.

Most don’t find out until 4th or 5th grade. I guess they’re ahead of the class.

Missing_Person · December 11, 2013, 6:33am

https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/1471771_10152108581534309_842443462_n.jpg

It’s easy to stay that warm when your state holds the gates to Hades.

Saitsu · December 11, 2013, 6:38am

Like we need a specific hate Florida day.

Missing_Person · December 11, 2013, 7:00am

For America, the day that everywhere but Florida had winter weather was the most angry day of their lives.

For @d3v, it was Tuesday.

d3v · December 11, 2013, 9:18am

It’s wednesday here though.

Missing_Person · December 11, 2013, 10:05am

It’s Tuesday somewhere.