Total Recall and National Treasure
Scary Movie…Any of them.
that goes for Movie Movies in general.
Okay, I have sat through alot of horrible movies especially in the theater. I remember actually going to go see The Adventures Of Pluto Nash. I figured “Hey, it’s a movie with Eddie Murphy…how bad could it be?” Needless to say, that’s probably one of the worst movies with Eddie Murphy I ever watched.
I also remember watching 3 Ninjas: High Noon At Mega Mountain as a kid…I liked the 3 Ninjas movies…but even then I thought that movie was lame as shit. Only thing I remember about it is that it had Hulk Hogan in it
Later, I started to get cynical towards going to the movies. I remember being somehow convinced to go see dumb movies like National Treasure and Sahara…I was starting to hate cliche treasure hunting movies…which leads me to this next piece of shit.
I honestly have no idea how I got conned into seeing this movie. I knew the movie looking fucking stupid from the trailers. I hated the actors that were in it…and it just looked like your typical dumb summer blockbuster movie in the making. I am talking about Into The Blue…just typing about this movie pisses me off…I actually wanted to kill those responsible for taking me to see this trash…even more so that they actually liked this shit…I hated Paul Walker and Jessica Alba…two “actors” who really couldn’t act, another cliche treasure hunting plot, plot holes and goofs, and the movie basically running on a idiot plot…you know those kind of movies where the story can’t progress unless everyone in the story is a moron? Yeah this is another one of those movies. The movie was so dumb and flat out insulting to my intelligence that not even the attempts at T&A could distract me from the fact of how much I hated this movie. If I watched this for the first time on regular TV, I wouldn’t have been as pissed off as I was…but it’s a different story in the theater where everybody knows you paid to see this crap. No movie I have seen has ever made me want to murder someone, except for Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen. That was a infuriating experience. It wasn’t just a bad Transformers movie, it was a bad movie period.
Last terrible movie I saw in the theater was Hancock with Will Smith…I don’t need to say anything more. I just don’t go out of my way to see a bad movie in the theater. I am very picky about what movies I would even consider going to the movies to these days.
Television? I remember seeing this movie called The Box with James Mardsten[sp?] and Cameron Diaz? The movie was confusing as shit [which kinda makes sense since I found out later it was based on a episode of the Twilight Zone]…but that still doesn’t excuse the fact that watching the movie made me bored to the point I fell asleep before I even finished watching it.
I also forgot about Mortal Kombat Annihilation…I like to forget that that movie exists…
A lot of “bad-movies” are actually really fun to watch and entertaining (Troll 2, Plan 9 from outer space, Manos,The Room). The REALLY awful movies are the ones that attempt to be serious, but just are terrible as a whole.
That being said, the worst film has to be ATM. The plot is so terrible and incohearant that it’s not even funny, it’s just ulcer-creating. At one point, the characters escape from the killer (who is like 1 man, and the main characters are all grown men and one grown woman) just to run back to him for no appearant reason.
This is pretty much what I was getting at earlier. While there’s no denying that each one is one major misfire after another, I would rather marathon The Room, Troll 2, Manos: The Hands of Fate, etc., than watch movies like Max Payne or Dreamcatcher, which are just dull and uninspired lumps of off-season shovelware. The latter movies go nowhere; the former movies go off the rails in a blaze of glory.
no doubt!
Max Payne was awful; ugh, at some point he had wings or some nonsense? I fell asleep twice throughout my three experiences watching it. The third time, I had to force myself to stay awake just to get through it.
I really liked The House of The Dead, because of that entertainment factor. The whole ending sequence (~last 30 mins) was just so godlike and hilarious.
Max Payne was just a cliche cop movie really with only a few references to the games. The movie even has the nerve to have a sequel hook after the credits. This is one of those movies where you don’t even stay to see what’s after the credits because at this point you don’t care
Also to the OP, if you’re one of those types that intentionally seeks out awful movies, try looking at this list. It keeps getting updated frequently. Honorable mentions included Battlefield Earth and the Adam Sandler “comedy” Jack & Jill
I don’t want to watch an Adam Sandler movie. I just get depressed when I realize how hard he’s fallen as an actor…
Yea man, he was so sophisticated before.
I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic or being serious. His movies got formulaic and stale after a while. They were essentially the same movie. I am specifically talking about when he was doing stuff in the mid-late 2000s like Grown ups and such…it doesn’t matter really, they’re all the same movie
No, I just remember when he was actually funny. Now it just hurts to watch what’s left of his career flounder about like dying worm.
These days, he only does movies done by his production company Happy Madison which only churn out terrible movies these days. As long as Happy Madison exists, he will continue churning out awful movies…that is until his production company goes bankrupt
I almost forgot about that Dungeons and Dragons movie…the one that had one of the Wayans and some bald guy with blue lipstick
D&D had redeeming factors to it tho, like Jeremy Irons eyebrows.
SF: The Legend of Chun Li
First and only time I saw a movie theater boo at a screen mid-movie.
Ugh…I knew that entire franchise was gonna suck just from seeing the scene where they got their “ninja names”…and none of the damn names were japanese. Egg Shen…you done fucked up.
Here you go: Nostalgia Critic tells you everything that’s wrong with this movie in his usual hilarious style.
I sit and watch 3 Ninjas and wonder how somebody hasnt been on tv hasnt blamed school shootings on it.
Or tried to blame it for that crazy chick in British Columbia who went on a crotch-punting spree back in '09…ruptured one dude’s nuts and launched them back up into his abdomen.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1WRlJB6kyjQ
Thought I would like this since I love comedies and knew the cast from other stuff. I guess you have to be high to get its plot because I don’t see it.