I agree on that as well… It seems to me like the whats next show in moments where:
the silence when your together… i mean that silence where only questions are… “u hungry?”
you can finish a rant or topic in your mind before they do
where ‘the future’ talk becomes a topic a weeeee bit too early.
so the whats next im tryin to avoid an let things show gradually… turning it into a FUN version of the guess but learning game for me.
texting
texting
like a cable commercial that comes on in my area by Comcast…“have you looked at your bill lately…”
I dont get charged for texting since im unlimited… but i noticed a drastic increase. 2008 i was at like 350 a month…TOTAL…EVERYONE. Now… now… my joint this past sept was at 3200…kid u not. that was an awakening moment that pointed we have lost the term space… an i mean it was a daily routine of good morning (if i didnt it wouldve been a issue) continuous text thru the day an even when i got home… yeah i had to go cold turkey an find my old self again.
1000x yes. We’ll be like, laying in bed or out to eat and he’ll say, “Talk about something.” I’ll respond, “I don’t have anything to talk about.” I generally don’t. I don’t go out every night to parties or hang out all the time with other people. So, my responses turn into a blog of my day: **Class. Teacher pissed me off. This test. This idiot on the bus trying to hit on me. Home. -> Rinse and repeat. **And with that, it’ll be like, “Meh. Nothing happened today.” I’d love to do more things so I could have more shit to talk about, but college kills me. Maybe if I get accepted into the study abroad program for Japanese, that would be A LOT to talk about and tons of space. Hahaha.
But on a serious note: Shit just becomes so mundane and routine. I miss some freshness. Like that new car smell type. But what makes it hard is the person might not be a bad person. You generally enjoy their company and have a good time with them. But you can do all that with friends too. The lines of being best friends, friends with benefits and “lovers” sort of blurs.
blurs… i think the definitive terms of FRIENDS–DATING–RELATIONSHIP has become WTF…
Like the last two relationships…u might laugh…we had to figure out when the hell did we START this relationship, roflmao. I mean it! So I think the understanding of those terms have been thrown out the door… 2 dates an ya a couple. like DAMN do i even have a challenger??? then suddenly ya look up an ya in a relationship… then ya look up an the “weekend” sleepover (consisting of friday night an saturday night go home sunday) has turned into keep me company (ive heard this from numerous men an women) an its outta nowhere at that…which goes back to my point we have lost touch with our ability to pay attention an jump into things to damn fast
think on this
when was the last time you actually had a woman/man playin HARD TO GET…no. Not pulling your string an others to combine all your perks for their benefit… but a hard to get but you know your going to get them.
when was the last time you had a argument that really showed the others views on things outside of emotions, materialistic things, an random ish… talkin bout good argument that both of you may disagree but it never led to drama…
yeah ive been readjusting myself an the partners i choose…
Hell no. I was in that scenario more times than I liked. I was like, “Oh, we’re dating now?” We had to sit down and figure out an anniversary date. It was so funny, “What do you like?” I’ll be like, “I like the number 17… The 17th sounds good.” And it’ll go from there. Happened with my last ex. We picked April 17th. Hahahahah! Those were the days.
I think I forgot how to play “hard to get”. At least consciously. I got so complacent that I’m losing my touch. Gosh. This sucks balls.
Finding anyone with similar interest is a task in itself. No matter if you’re male or female. The joys of an adventure is the process. Not the end. Just a FYI. Good luck though. Keep ya head up, man.
Alright here we go I got me a situation. So when I got with this chick we had sex alot (like 3 times a day minimum) now its like she doesnt want to have sex as much… it sux I want more. How can you keep a strong sex life going??? How do you retain that spark?
or am I just going to have to deal with it… help!
Edit: weve been together almost a year.
Edit2: I dont beleieve im asking for relationship advice on SRK. lol
Edit3: read more of the posts on the thread* Answered some questions but still in the dark.
Here’s a thought… Stop having sex so fuckin’ much. Seriously. That shit gets pretty boring pretty fast. I was with a guy and it was everyday after class. Talk about Zzzz status. So, you better get a fleshlight or something as a supplement to actual pussy.
Nah ur not.
It makes sense. I guess Im being selfish so its cool. I just need to not put so much emphasis on sex.
I mean seriously at least I get laid. Ya know. I should be greatful not demanding. Thanx neesa I just needed a kick in the a$$.
Yeah I mean you could be like people on here who don’t get laid
And IMO breaks in between sex make it better. If you were having sex alot I assume it was good right? You know it’s better when there’s some anticipation.
Maybe not a bad thing. More like a warning. Like Koop said, maybe you’re talking too much over text, IM, Skype, FB, etc… So when you’re in person it’s like, “Well shit. I said everything already.” Putting on the brakes seems to be needed at this point. Exploring other avenues and options together can help re-build the conversation so it doesn’t become so mundane and lametarded.
As for me? I’m trying to get back into SF like I usta be. I know then, we’d have something to talk about. It was just a matter of find the right stick that wouldn’t make my wrists wanna explode. Thanks Carpal Tunnel. /sarcasm. But, at least I’m willing to make some sort of compromise, y’know? Once the semester is over, I can drag him to more art museums and explore NYC together.
But, I think it becomes a bad thing if you don’t try to work at it and just let it fall by the wayside. Then complications arise and the arguements set it. Possible breaks/break-ups seem to be the end game for that scenario.
Yeah. There’s nothing wrong with being sexual. By all means, we are sexual creatures. But once sex becomes too routine and… I don’t want to say “expected”, but I can’t think of a better way to describe it… Anyway, it sort of dulls down the sexual experience. Like Kaz said, breaks in between sex is good. Maybe every other day or however you guys wanna plan it out. But everyday 3x a day? Not happenin’ cap’n.
Glad you’re thankful. Not everyone is gettin’ much around in these parts. At least you don’t hafta see Handjalina every night.
Well neesa an kez tapped on a few key things so ill just add on:
one thing to do is actually talk… communicate. I’ve never had boring sex…ill say it again… ive never had boring sex. I ask my partner what they like dont like…etc. an work on the likes to the fullest…
stop having the expecting mindframe… this is for men. when she comes over… dont even think about it. dont even put it in your agenda. cause when u do it–for us-- becomes a distraction an causes you to miss a lot of other key things cause your too busy thinkin when she gonna take her shower, man she she dressed up–aw im gettin that ass, come on start touching me… or should i touch her…
just cause she has moments of stamina doesnt mean shes the ‘all the time’ chick. i was confused by this once… at first it was like damn everytime we together it was like porn set… all day long… then i would have moments where it was like one an done… then i grew the hell up in my brain an learned sometimes they have long winded moments.
change it up… dont be afraid to ask for some head… her moment of sex may not be in the zone her to be gettin pumped on but if thats “ya chick” then she should be open to satifying u when you need be… an u will be amazed how she may be down to help her “boo” out…
I know you dig the lady… but guess what. you do no more… you laid everything out. Ball is not in your court no more now go relax an continue your ‘hunt’ elsewhere until she comes (if) around… u did what you needed to do… she needs to ‘think’… ok… sounds like she confused an her interest is in multiple areas (imo)… so again… relax playboy. no L cause you didnt put your all into just that one!
