I Can't Ever Grow A Mustache

because Tom Selleck’s is better.


Don’t know who he is

Don’t give a shit who he is

Mustaches are fucking gay

Mustaches are less demeaning dirty sanchez’s

Your drunk

This guy…


maybe you should stop succing diccs :coffee:

Do you want your own?


And here I thought his reasoning for not growing a mustache would be to not put to shame the facial hair on his dates.


I wish I could grow a mustache so thick that you’d struggle to get a comb through it, but alas always ends up looking like I stuck pubes on my faces


Famous mustache tier:


[details=Spoiler]Nobody will ever rock a stache this hard.



[details=Spoiler]Sam should be number 1, and he would be if Magnum wasn’t. But Sam should be number 1.







[details=Spoiler]The other Sam.



[details=Spoiler]Famous for all the wrong reasons, nobody can ever wear this again.

He ruined it for everyone.

Honorable Mention:

[details=Spoiler]While it might not be the most impressive stache, the man is BAMF and it deserves recognition.


He just wouldn’t be the same without it.

Jeeze, its like I shave right before every picture that ever gets taken of me… or people don’t take my picture when I have a mustache on purpose because it would break everybody else’s spirit at not being able to grow a mustache like mine. My mustache is top tier better than Hitler’s because I’ve never killed anyone or tried to unite Deutschland, better than Yosemite because ginger, better than Mario because mine isn’t all blocky.

Those top two got me though…

I can grow one, but the hair is stiff as fuck. I know I can use a beard conditioner to make it softer but that’s too much work. I had one a few years ago for Movember and it was embarrassing carrying that thing around in its infancy. Even my dad, who has a monster of a mustache himself, couldn’t refrain from busting my balls over it.

These days I just keep a five o’clock shadow beard stubble. It’s still a pain in the ass because if I don’t trim it once every couple of days it gets pretty thick.

<-- THIS GUY didn’t make the Mustache Tier List??

Seriously, I thought about shaving my beard down to a mustache and growing it a bit. There’s definitely a part of me that likes the idea of making women and children of the right age uncomfortable with nothing more than an ill advised piece of facial hair and a creepy smile.

I’m actually the exact same. I grew my mustache to full once, and although I loved it, I got heckled over it by everybody, including my parents. My beard grows in magnificently, but got damn, can’t grow a 'stache.

that mustache tier list is pretty fucking top tier. You left a few people off the list of gg mustaches (like Vincent Price, Richard Pryor, and Hulk Hogan)

I’m going to post the best mustache of all time. Unrivaled for decades now. Do not open this spoiler if you wish to avoid being eternally jelly for the rest of your life.



no way, good sir. That in no way can handle the awesomeness of:


But if you wanna play the spoiler game, trying to hide the greatest mustache of all, then we shall play the spoiler game:



This guy is cheat, athletic commision needs to investigate, that tash is obviously been doping.

no love for Mr. Pringle

this guy is doing it wrong, I think:

No, I think he’s being innovative. The future of mustache application. Why just stop at growing the hair under your nose, when you can have a 2nd one on your head?

Think about it. You have a mustache. The guy next to you has TWO mustaches. Who’s winning with the ladies there?

You just convinced me to grow a dick mustache.