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An orange rolls into a hardware store. The owner says, “You know, we have a paint color named after you.”
“You have a color named ‘Steve’?”
RROD. There. That’s my joke.
What did the math book say to the science book?
“Man, I got problems…”
guilty gear
what happened to the wooden car?
it wooden go.
What’s the difference between the Red Hot Chili Peppers and Harriet Tubman?
answer
Spoiler
Harriet Tubman was a heroine to the slaves while the Chili Peppers were slaves to heroin.
How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ears pierced?
w/ pirate voice
Spoiler
a buccaneer!
what do you call a pig that does karate?
a pork chop!
Q: What did Sushi A say to Sushi B?
A: WASABI?
Q: What did Hitler always hate to find in his treasure chest?
A: JEWELS!
Q: What musical note sounds when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?
A: A FLAT MINOR!
This is more of a cheesy pickup line than an actual joke, but…
Man talking to woman: “So how much does a polar bear weigh?”
Woman: “Uh…”
Man: “Enough to break the ice. Hi, my name’s…”
**What do you call George Bush with an afro? …A hairy Bush.
What do you call George Bush swimming in the ocean? …A Bush with crabs.**
How does Hitler tie his shoes?
With little Natzis.
whos soulja boys best friend?
youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
My personal favorite to get ostracized from parties and other similar social gatherings.
Hear about the Tom Jones disease? It’s pretty common. In fact, “It’s not unusual…” </carlton dance>
Did you hear the Energizer Bunny was arrested? Crazy stuff man…charged with battery.
Two nuts were on a plane. One was “a salted”.
This has quickly become my new favorite thread. Cracking me up with the cheesiness yo! Anyways, what did the psychiatrist say to the crazy guy who thought he was a pair of curtains: Pull yourself together!
I’ve actually used this. And no, not successfully.
Science humor!
One atom says to another, “I think I’ve just lost one of my electrons!” “Are you certain?” asks the other. “Yeah,” says the first. “I’m positive.”
what’s a ninja’s favorite drink?
WATAAA!
Damn, I laughed hard at this one…