Put your thoughts into words and write stories, thats what I do.
I am coming to the realization that I have some major issues. To start it off, I have major problems with coping with life. Whenever something goes wrong I run to whatever substance I can find to make me feel better. Iāve been sober for the past 2 months but it has been very difficult. Even now all i want to do is smoke, drink, and listen to some music and zone out. The only thing stopping me is knowing that I will feel so shitty the day after when my issues resurface.
Second, I donāt think Iāve ever really been happy being by myself. Iāve had a few relationships where I put my all into it and when shit goes downhill, my sense of belonging and usefulness goes right out the door with that person. I donāt have that many friends so maybe that plays a factor as well. Been single for going on a month now and Iām still struggling to find myself and gain some usefulness outside of someone else.
Lastly, I can have some pretty bad mood swings at times. One minute I will be talkative and funny as shit but the next minute iāll have this fuck you look on my face and it tends to scare people away sometimes. Iāve been trying to work on it whenever I sense it happening but sometimes it just feels like second nature.
I know I should probably go speak to someone but Iām very reluctant to tell someone that I dont know all of my issues. I just feel like this person doesnt know shit about me Iām just another dollar sign to them. I usually just talk to my mother about them but shes at the point where all she can do is listen because she cant really give me any advice. The main thing that keeps me back from seeking pro help is that I donāt want to feel like a crazy person. Something keeps telling me that I can get a grip on life if I can just give it some time and take things a day at a time.
Any insight would be greatly appreciated.
people with mental problems are you trump supporters? just asking
ANXIETY HAMMER
Go see a therapist. Try a number of them and find someone you like and are comfortable with. You could go to a doctor/psychiatrist and find out if you do have some kind of mental whackness.
Is it possible that being introvert leads to depression & anxiety?
Thatās kind of a loaded question. Anxiety and depression has no face/character really. It can affect all kinds of people, regardless of whether they are extroverted or introverted.
I hear voices. When i go into public i hear things.
Kill this fucking faggot
Kill him now
Drop this guy
Dont let him get away
Cut his dick off
It gets worse the denser crowds are
I especially hate mandarin because it involves a lot of shus and shis which sound to my ears like shoot
Korean bothers me too
Cantonese is ok
I used to hear voices during white noide moments but thankfully that went away
White noise ie. Running water. A fan. Dryer or washing machine
Medication does not help
I have a criminal record now because i did a home invasion at night because i thought people were after me and looking for me in a wooded neighbourhood i was unfamiliar with and nobody would answer their doors at night. The house i jumped through the window of everyone was awake and standing there but they were unwilling to answer the door but they happilly called the police on me and i got arrested because i hid in one of their closets.
Ive thought of suicide multiple times
Was never meant to be a loaded question, it was in a sense curiosity that got me to ask question, maybe I should ask it in different way.
Have you ever dealt with anxiety or depression and whats your method of keeping it at bay?
I think itās safe to say that weāre all anxious or depressed to different degrees during different events that happen in life (loss of a loved one, losing your job, fear of failure, etcā¦). I would say for me personally the best thing is to talk about it(whether itās a friend, family member, or professional help) and not keep it in. This is especially true for guys(there is a reason male suicide rates are almost 3:1 now compared to women). Now there are different degrees when it comes to this stuff, but know that youāre not alone and there are A LOT of other people that struggle just like you. Yeah youāll have good days and bad days and some people take meds to help them get through, but whatever you do donāt keep it all in.
Youāre going to have people that will tell you to āget over itā or your first world problems are nothing compared to others less fortunate and etc. Donāt hold anything against these kind of people. We all react differently to different life situations, and what may come naturally or more easily to some to others they are developmental skills.
Oh yeah, and exercise works wonders. Also donāt give up on your hobbies!
Manā¦I had a relapse this month and it was pretty bad. You know, most people might drink 3-6 beers in a night every now and then. If I do that, if I have one drink, a binge starts. I will drink myself into oblivion and beyond. No, I cant control myself. Or, I can, but it is extremely difficult. I like being drunk. I donāt give a fuck about anything when Iām blastedā¦thatās what also gets me into trouble.
I suffer from extreme anxiety and depression (among a myriad of other mental issues). Iām heavily medicated for both/all but the issues are still there. Iām gettingā¦trying to learn how to cope with my feelings and just let them go but its very hard. I went to some kinda meetings for three months or so. Every morning I would go to group and learn new and different ways to cope with my issues. I practice some of the stuff I learned there and it does help.
Iām on a heavy dose of Xanax for my anxiety. My prescription is, 2mg three times a day. I cut that down to .5mg twice a day. It really does help with my anxiety but itsā¦ever heard that song Master of Puppets? Yeah, those tiny, yellow, pills are pulling my strings. Iām a slave to that shit. I donāt want to be anymore, so I decided to cut down my dose. Took me like 3 months to get it down to where its atā¦I was pretty fuckinā sick those three months.
Iāve gotten to the point where I can go without any Xanax for two or three days. But the sickness comes after those 2 or 3 days. Nausea, vomiting, cold sweats, hallucinations, all my senses go whack. I start hearing things and smelling things that arenāt there. Its like crack head shit, man.
Anyhow, thatās all for now. Iām ashamed to even post here right now. Iām pretty sure while I was in a drunken stupor I was saying a lot of things I shouldnātā¦shit I should just keep to myself. At least I didnāt get myself banned this time. /shrug
I wouldnt touch xanax if my life depended on it. I got prescribed quarter pills but decided to not go forward with that. Instead, i opted to buy canabis chocolate bars, and i can say that its helped me cope with my panic attacks extremely well. For me though
Youāve probably already tried this before but, have you used weed as a substitution for Xanax?
Maybe he shouldnāt be sleeping with knives
Maybe itās good he isnāt driving
Damn sounds like you need a vacation in the looney bin and to be observed soon dude
The weed he smokes is probably going to be low tier even though good weed is legally available. Hell there are some good places in napa valley
But dude xanax is used by strippers, police men, public speakers
The thing though is sounds like we are dealing with a very paranoid individual
I do smoke/use cannabis. Not much but I do. Sometimes it will help calm me down, other times it just makes me more anxious. Its a crap shoot. I know the whole indica vs sativa thing. If I get it from a dispensary I can get what I want. I like the chocolate bars but theyāre pricey and they go fast. They always seem to calm me down. Theyāre 100mg candy bars, dark chocolate. I can also choose the strain (indica) that I want. If I get it on the streets I generally donāt know what the strain is. I usually get it on the streets.
I only use them for panic attacks so i always have a good supply of chocolate bars on hand
My anxiety is pretty bad. Iām extremely anxious right now, just sitting in my room watching my favorite show. My hands are sweaty, Iām a bit shaky, I feel like Iām gonna jump outta my skin. I feel like I need to scream. Iām not having a panic attack, Iām just extremely anxious for no reason. It does not feel good. If I were to go out now, to a store or some shit, I would most likely have a panic attack. Thatās not a pretty sight.
P.S. I took my meds at 11:30. Just waiting for them to kick in so I get a little relief.
@drizzt360 do those pills you take have a shitty comedown effect? Iāve been reading up on it and from what I understand the pills make you feel very very happy then make you come crashing right back down.