SRK Lounge: The Search for Ronin

regulate · April 28, 2016, 7:14am

The_Damned · April 28, 2016, 7:15am

(I guess that confirms that Zeus is indeed her father post-New 52. Lame.)

Huh. I was led to believe otherwise about the Amazons by this lengthy two-page article, @RockBogart: http://www.themarysue.com/wonder-woman-paternal-narrative/. I mean, I remember Paradise Island having restrictions about men setting foot on the island in most instances and quite a few Amazonian women being uncomfortable, unsure, or outright untrusting and hostile towards men, but, again, outside of Amazons Attack’s stupidity and the straight-up “evil” Amazons of Flashpoint, that doesn’t reach the level of what I read here:

Spoiler

When Diana first travels to Paradise Island, with an injured Hermes in tow, we hear a voice: “Can you smell it, sisters? Our air be putrid with musk. Aye, what hangs between the shanks now fouls my nose. Perhaps I shall take my blade and separate the offense from the offender. Leave them to shrink and wither on the sand.” When Wonder Woman speaks against this, the voice asks “Who dares?”, as if no one would.

The word balloons are distorted and not associated with any character. When I first read it, I thought it was the spirit of Paradise Island itself, which would have been somewhat damning. Reading on, I guessed it was Aleka. But in any case it is the first words we hear from any Amazon, and none of her sisters contradict her in any way. Even her queen doesn’t chastise her for threatening castration against a male guest (and a god, at that). I don’t think we ever hear an Amazon speak a contrary opinion; Aleka’s floating voice is the only one the writer gives us on the subject. If it’s not the common Amazon view, why not let us hear from someone else? As it is, this depiction of the Amazons has enough editorial support to spread to other series and writers: in her first appearance, in Demon Knights #1, Exoristos, an exiled Amazon, says “I come from an island where men are castrated and women are pleased.” This seems to pass for casual conversation among the New 52 Amazons.

(When I speak of “the Amazons,” I am excepting Diana, who seems different from them and not representative in her opinions.)

This happens to be a common sexist stereotype of independent or feminist women: that they hate all men to the point of wanting to castrate them. It brings to mind Rush Limbaugh’s “man-hating feminazis.”

But Azzarello’s depiction of the Amazons as man-haters goes much further. Later we learn that, to replenish their ranks, they go to sea, board boats crewed by human men, and seduce them. Then we see an image of the Amazons holding their swords to the necks of these men: “Their lives… are drained from them,” and they are thrown overboard, dead. (The most reasonable interpretation is that the Amazons kill them; they don’t actually look “drained,” by sex or magic, when they’re being threatened by swords.)

Nine months later the Amazons give birth. The girls they keep; the boys… apparently, the Amazons are willing to kill them too. Fortunately, the (male) god Hephaestus rescues them, trading weapons for the infants, and raising them to work in his smithy, where they say they are not slaves; they are artists, and happy. One says that without Hephaestus, they would have been “thrown in the tide — to drown, unloved.” Hephaestus proves to have the empathy that the Amazons entirely lack; he mentions that his mother (Hera) cast him out to die, and because of that experience he could “never allow” that to happen to the unwanted male children of the Amazons. He’s a good guy. They’re murderers. And Hippolyta is the queen of the murderers.

(The murders seem completely gratuitous. Perhaps the Amazons are worried that sailors, left alive, might follow them back to Themyscira. If so, there’s an easier way to do all this. Take a boat to an island or the shore of a continent. Liberate some local clothes. Have sex with a man. Go home. Is this beyond them, or do they just like killing men?)

These goes beyond sexist stereotypes, and begins the echo the views of paranoid misogynists. I am reminded of Pat Robertson’s quote: “Feminism is a socialist, anti-family, political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.” (I am not suggesting Azzarello shares these views, only that he finds them useful, and somehow appropriate, in a Wonder Woman story.)

And so one of the core themes of Marston’s Wonder Woman—that of the value of independent (dare I say feminist?) women, their relationships, and what they can accomplish together—is entirely repudiated. Independent women, rather than creating a healthy and loving community that the world (and Diana) can learn something good from, in fact become man-hating, castration-loving malefactors who murder the men they use to impregnate them and would likewise murder their own male infants if a kind (male) god didn’t offer them a better deal. They are essentially supervillains. Wonder Woman and the rest of the JLA should capture them and lock them up.

Admittedly, Azzarello does not directly tell us that all communities of independent women would turn out this way. He simply takes away the one example we had of a good community of such women, and replaces it with a horrific one. Just as Aleka’s voice seems to represent all Amazons, because none of them contradict her, so too do these vicious Amazons seem to represent all communities of independent women—because there are no alternatives within the world of the narrative. The change he has made to the Amazons of Paradise Island—who have always had an extremely significant symbolic and thematic role in the Wonder Woman saga—is so enormous, and so ugly, that one looks for some suggestion that they do not symbolize a theme opposite to Marston’s: that a community of independent women would be evil and murderous. In vain. The only thing to compare them to is Hephaestus and his assistants, a community of happy artists brought together by the compassionate god who saved them from the evil women. And that community is all male.

Completely unrelated, but linked to on another article from the same website:

https://youtu.be/9tU-D-m2JY8

While the comments are definitely atrocious, that’s exactly why watching the awkward silence and squirming is even more delicious and hilarious than it might otherwise be.

Also, I never understood why or when “read mean Tweets” became a thing like Twitter actually ever meant shit.

BREAKING NEWS: people are assholes, especially on the Internet and especially if they’re the type of sports fans who are losers living vicariously through their teams to make up for their otherwise shitty existences.

Million · April 28, 2016, 7:18am

cheh,

I’m a fan of the Tom Leykis show, but it just isn’t “poppin’” like usual whenever they have Gustavo and some of his friends on for the “Ask a Mexican” segments…the questions are rarely interesting/funny, and whenever Gustavo and Tom talk to each other it’s just…it’s “dead air” boring as hell to me… it’s to the point where I avoid listening whenever that guy is on…to make matters worse, they talked about baseball at some point today…I know Tom is a fan of that and all sports but nah bruh, fuck that…

…that one time I was taken to a baseball game when I was around 10 or 11 years old…the shit put me to sleep SO fast it may as well have been a tranquilizer dart…or any 5 minutes of a Ghost in the ShellZZZZzzzzz episode.

CHEAP SHOTS, folks… I love them.

drunkards_walk · April 28, 2016, 7:29am

So some days after my full-time, I work part-time as a tutor and I have a student who is in high school, but she’s pretty fine and I’d like to fuck her. I’m only 25, what do y’all think? My friends keep telling me if her first phone was an iPhone, then she is too young, but I say fuck that we are both legal amirite? Or am I destined to end up on the 8 o’clock news?

Raz0r · April 28, 2016, 7:33am

Do it. Tell us when you’re doing it and the address. I want to make sure the police know where the offense is happening.

Pertho · April 28, 2016, 7:33am

How would you like to get fired today?

crotchpuncha · April 28, 2016, 7:33am

You’re destined for unemployment at the very least.

drunkards_walk · April 28, 2016, 7:39am

It’s technically not an offense though…

The_Damned · April 28, 2016, 7:41am

(“Haha” at Germany apparently putting traffic lights on the ground in at least Augsburg to accommodate people who can’t be bothered to look up from smart-phones even when crossing the street or train tracks.

…By “haha”, clearly I mean “I’d weep for humanity if it weren’t always such a mass of feculent idiocy.”)

If for some reason you’re being serious, it would be a(n immensely) stupid thing to do. Even if she’s for some reason interested and you two were to have consensual sex, females playing “the rape card” is too strong (out of regret), especially if it’s technically true since you would have had sex with someone who was legitimately under-aged and, worse, technically your student as well.

That said, go for it. Just don’t blame us when you get jailed instantly after pissing her off or, you know, for doing such stupid shit in the first place out of sheer thirst.

Pertho · April 28, 2016, 7:46am

I don’t think you understand the situation. You are a tutor for one of two high schools in a town of 18,000 talking about wanting to engage in sexual relations with students.

So, how many applications have you put in for yet?

Vynce · April 28, 2016, 7:50am

…Keep _walking.

BB_Hoody · April 28, 2016, 7:56am

Why are you even entertaining the thought? Here’s a rule of thumb to live by. If it’s gonna fuck with your money. It’s something you likely shouldn’t do. And I think a tutor banging his barely legal student isn’t gonna sit well with other potential clients.

drunkards_walk · April 28, 2016, 7:56am

Maybe I misrepresented the situation. The girl is 18 years old (plus the hooking up thing was just a thought I had, nothing substantial really). With all that said it’s still that bad huh?

Vynce · April 28, 2016, 7:59am

Tell me you’re a math tutor

drunkards_walk · April 28, 2016, 8:00am

Yeah I think I’ll take this advice…probably was stupid to even entertain the idea

drunkards_walk · April 28, 2016, 8:01am

Why does it matter the subject?

Pertho · April 28, 2016, 8:01am

Well the problem is that he is a tutor in Westminster, Maryland with a birthday in the next month and whose year you can trace back. Who am I kidding, his birthday is on one of the accounts he has for fighting games. The town only has two high schools. Which is funny because you only need to take 2 screenshots to give administrators all the context they need to go find whichever 25 year old tutor is it that is creeping.

Sure nothing may have happened, but I think this situation deserves a haiku nonetheless:

He plucked the apple
The tree branch was too young still
Hunger needs restraint.

SNAAAAKE · April 28, 2016, 8:03am

jail isn’t so bad. didn’t get raped yet. food is ok but I miss mgo :crybaby:

blueleon · April 28, 2016, 8:04am

Yea. What is it you do? Unless you are standing around, watching 4K television and playing grabass with new friends at your job.

Like what?

@ Shaft Agent; Do you have music playing in the store where you work?

crotchpuncha · April 28, 2016, 8:04am

If you have to ask dude.