SRK Lounge: More like turned on by Lesbian Seagulls

NickRocks · August 15, 2016, 6:16am

yessss that will do nicely

Vynce · August 15, 2016, 6:18am

I’m about to conk out but I want to remember: Danny Glover would be an S tier VP nominee.

Because, Wallstreet? I’m- no, all of us. We’re all getting too old

BBQ · August 15, 2016, 6:31am

Been watching Shaka Zulu and was curious to know why they sacrifice their own when one is getting buried, is it to have a servant in the afterlife?

Azure · August 15, 2016, 6:32am

M’man uses the term “conk out”, too. :tup:

Tekno_Virus · August 15, 2016, 6:59am

I wish I was her Kupo bear such that every time she would be cuddling with it, she would be cuddling with me.

Rick_Ross · August 15, 2016, 7:55am

Viper is an endless source of meme hilarity, making him one of the greatest artists of this century. And we have only been 16 years into the 21st century!

orochizoolander · August 15, 2016, 7:55am

So I got shocked at work today reaching for something in the freezer and accidentally touched some hole in the wall. I’ve never been actually electrocuted before, damn it really does cook your body like in movies/tv lol, didn’t get any serious injury aside from a purple hand, but yeah death by electrocution has moved up several notches as one of the most painful ways to die. @Million care to chime in as our resident expert in physical torture?

Oh and Boston trip was GDLK, @maxx found a killer deal 2 double beds at lakeside inn at Wakefield MA, walked around all over from Beacon Hill to the freedom trail to the aquarium, the nightlife downtown, Chinatown, and other shit. It’s so weird to drive around in a city where you can get to any part in like 15 minutes or less really different from NY it’s nice and cleaner, but not nearly as poppin. Highlights were seeing all the fellow desi niggas cleaning up house on hot ass white women, eating at Alden and Harlow probably one of the best meals I’ve ever had and waitress brought us 3 free dishes after I told her I wait tables part time too (or is that normal at higher end restuarants?), and of course seeing my boy’s yankee’s lighter stop working as soon as he tried to use it in front of Fenway Park:rofl:

pedoviejo · August 15, 2016, 7:59am

I kmow how to stop teknos asain waifu posting.

Srk should get this man married

NickRocks · August 15, 2016, 8:02am

looks like someone isnt down with the CAMPAIGN

Black_Jaguar · August 15, 2016, 8:10am

Can a mod/admin let us know which user is “ignored” the most?

My money is either on Twinko Virus or Hecatombz clone #2099

angelpalm · August 15, 2016, 8:44am

wtf’s bury post

Pertho · August 15, 2016, 8:52am

This is the worst day since yesterday.

Million · August 15, 2016, 9:05am

I’m thinking “death by fire” would still rank above it…though electrocution might be one of the “top tiers” as well. The worst I could imagine with the old forms of torture/execution would be the Brazen Bull… being cooked to death inside a hollowed brass bull; that’s one of mankind’s shining achievements in terms of creatively sadistic execution methods. Heh, they need to bring that and other things back. It’s hopeless though… current American society is too soft to seriously execute people as it is now with the “humane” (haha, being “humane” about killing someone…that’s amusing) options.

Women’s Beach Volleyball is on right now…but the Brazilians are being party poopers by wearing full-length body suits for some reason :tdown:

Slurmz · August 15, 2016, 9:17am

The smoke would kill you, before the fire gets to you. So it would probably be death by suffocation.

WTF-AKUMA-HAX · August 15, 2016, 9:37am

1st post of Sunday Bunday

unless you count that waste one… eating booty and booty fallout?! TOO FAR

Spoiler

http://pre15.deviantart.net/abdb/th/pre/i/2012/351/a/0/meatbun_bun_by_zasshoku_onnagata-d5oc4bc.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/Nri1Atp.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/RgBnNud.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/8qd62XJ.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/0eCvki6.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/eHZklpQ.jpg

SKULLGIRLS NPC?! #SQIGGY MY NIGGY

#nigoro pls

The_Damned · August 15, 2016, 10:04am

(Technically if you’re shocked and don’t die from it, you’re only “electrified”, @orochizoolander. It’s only “electrocution” if the person dies from it, though you’re hardly the only person to make that mistake.)

Anyway, given I’m feeling generous this weekend despite it being worse than normal, I’ll contribute to Sunday Bunday for once:

[details=Spoiler]

(Alt text is “I could never grasp mathematics 'til today.”)[/details]

“I want to protect that particular piece of anatomy.” [/soon-to-be-banned @“Tekno Virus”]

I see, @MIRACLEARROW. You know you’re obligated to break up with her if she doesn’t like though, right?

Also, given you’re mentioning this version of Sloth, I’m guessing you mean Brotherhood and not the first Fullmetal Alchemist anime. Is that correct?

Xvideos · August 15, 2016, 10:16am

This is some next level evil.

Girl uses Fifty Shades of Grey as basis for false rape claims against her father because her father is too strict.

In a tearful courtroom confession, a daughter has admitted using the best-selling sadomasochistic sex novel Fifty Shades of Grey as the basis for a series of false rape claims against her father.

Defence barrister Cathy McCulloch had, she said, never read the novel until she was called in late to defend the father, who was accused of eight incestuous rapes over a six-year period.

In her blog about the case, Ms McCulloch said the prospects for the father initially looked bleak.
“His daughter had given a compelling interview to the police and my client had absolutely no real defence other than ‘I did not do it’,” she wrote.

The only unusual thing about the interview was that in describing what her father had supposedly done and how her body had allegedly felt, she had used “certain words, phrases and descriptions which seemed beyond her years.”

Nothing might have come of this quirk, however, were it not for the fact that during Ms McCulloch’s otherwise routine first meeting with the father – on the day of the trial – he happened to mention that his daughter’s favourite book was “about a millionaire who takes a young woman under his wing and ‘teaches her about art’.”

“He had no idea what Fifty Shades of Grey was about,” added Ms McCulloch. “Neither I nor my instructing solicitor’s representative had read the book (honest!).”

The solicitor’s representative bought the book, which has sold more than 125 million copies worldwide and been turned into a film, and found “too many striking similarities between the [daughter’s police interview] and the book to be a coincidence.”

Ms McCulloch, a former police officer who is now a barrister at Church Court Chambers, persuaded the judge to adjourn the case so she could spend an afternoon and an evening reading the novel.

Within seven minutes of her beginning her cross-examination, the daughter burst into tears in the witness box and admitted she had made the whole thing up to teach her strict father a lesson.

Describing a cross-examination she had expected to last between two and three hours, Ms McCulloch wrote: “I started gently to put the complainant at ease. She agreed her father was strict, and that she was really annoyed with him for “ruining her life”.

“I then went straight to my final question – that she was so angry with her father that she had made this all up. She wavered.

“I raised the striking similarities between her interview and the book. She suddenly broke and said I was absolutely right. She had made the whole thing up because she was angry with her father and wanted to teach him a lesson.

“I asked her whether she had got all the ideas from Fifty Shades of Grey. She confirmed this book, and others – which she named. After seven minutes we were finished.

“The Judge directed the jury to acquit, stating that this case is “unique” in the whole of his career at the Bar and Judiciary.”

This is how special snowflakes get back at “strict” parents now. Bitch deserves 20 years in prison.

pedoviejo · August 15, 2016, 10:29am

Xvideos:

This is some next level evil.

Girl uses Fifty Shades of Grey as basis for false rape claims against her father because her father is too strict.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/fifty-shades-of-grey-50-shades-false-rape-claim-false-accusation-incest-rape-a7189786.html

In a tearful courtroom confession, a daughter has admitted using the best-selling sadomasochistic sex novel Fifty Shades of Grey as the basis for a series of false rape claims against her father.

Defence barrister Cathy McCulloch had, she said, never read the novel until she was called in late to defend the father, who was accused of eight incestuous rapes over a six-year period.

In her blog about the case, Ms McCulloch said the prospects for the father initially looked bleak.
“His daughter had given a compelling interview to the police and my client had absolutely no real defence other than ‘I did not do it’,” she wrote.

The only unusual thing about the interview was that in describing what her father had supposedly done and how her body had allegedly felt, she had used “certain words, phrases and descriptions which seemed beyond her years.”

Nothing might have come of this quirk, however, were it not for the fact that during Ms McCulloch’s otherwise routine first meeting with the father – on the day of the trial – he happened to mention that his daughter’s favourite book was “about a millionaire who takes a young woman under his wing and ‘teaches her about art’.”

“He had no idea what Fifty Shades of Grey was about,” added Ms McCulloch. “Neither I nor my instructing solicitor’s representative had read the book (honest!).”

The solicitor’s representative bought the book, which has sold more than 125 million copies worldwide and been turned into a film, and found “too many striking similarities between the [daughter’s police interview] and the book to be a coincidence.”

Ms McCulloch, a former police officer who is now a barrister at Church Court Chambers, persuaded the judge to adjourn the case so she could spend an afternoon and an evening reading the novel.

Within seven minutes of her beginning her cross-examination, the daughter burst into tears in the witness box and admitted she had made the whole thing up to teach her strict father a lesson.

Describing a cross-examination she had expected to last between two and three hours, Ms McCulloch wrote: “I started gently to put the complainant at ease. She agreed her father was strict, and that she was really annoyed with him for “ruining her life”.

“I then went straight to my final question – that she was so angry with her father that she had made this all up. She wavered.

“I raised the striking similarities between her interview and the book. She suddenly broke and said I was absolutely right. She had made the whole thing up because she was angry with her father and wanted to teach him a lesson.

“I asked her whether she had got all the ideas from Fifty Shades of Grey. She confirmed this book, and others – which she named. After seven minutes we were finished.

“The Judge directed the jury to acquit, stating that this case is “unique” in the whole of his career at the Bar and Judiciary.”

This is how special snowflakes get back on “strict” parents now. Bitch deserves 20 years in prison.

This is why you dint have kids, or beat the fear of god into them.

BullDancer · August 15, 2016, 10:35am

@“Shaft Agent” How are you holding up in LoseLouisiana? I swear that you go unaffected by all natural disasters like some kind of calf god.

Rick_Ross · August 15, 2016, 1:49pm

One last submission before sunday bunday ends

Spoiler

https://i.imgur.com/XkzSh6w.jpg