I don’t know why, I always thought the dude was hot. Something about his smile I guess.

“I don’t want to brag, but after Eddie and I knocked tiles out of my brother’s kitchen floor in the shape of “I HEART COCK,” we were elected city councilmen of OUTRAGEOUS! Ultimate prank!”
:lol:
Asta is way evil-er.
:sad:
Boyfriend gets back from New Mexico tomorrow night and I am
SO
EXCITED
even if I don’t get to see him that night. It couldn’t come sooner. My life is so incomplete! I really only have on friend in this town, I live here because of him, so when he’s not around… Man does shit suck.
yall niggas is gay.
I love how every 15 pages, someone comes in and says that
SAME EXACT THING
and nothing else.
Thank you for your contribution. :tup: Us niggas were unaware of our gayness, for the fifteenth time.
I’m going to rape the next fucker that comes in just to post yall niggas is gay. It’s like “Cool! A new post in the only thread where people don’t have to tack on ‘no homo’ on everything!” then “Even cooler, someone new contributing?” then :bluu: . . . :lol: If you at least mixed it up a bit, it’d be okay, but the fact that each and every one of you posts that exact god damned post just makes it that much worse. At least mix it up with “You niggers are gay.” or “yall niggas are gay” or “yall niggas is homosexual”
too predictable!
You n–
I was going to contribute somehow but now I just feel like a second-grade bi-curious failfuck.
I’ve ‘been’ with three guys, total. Slept with two casually (while drunk) and had a relationship with one.
We were good friends for quite a long time, my ‘boyfriend’ and me. He was very openly gay but never forced it on me nor did it really bother me. We ended up talking about relationships one night and I kept telling him about I felt like I was doomed to be lonely and how I really craved to be close to someone. I didn’t really think of him as gay, ever, so I was comfortable talking about my girl troubles/emotional state. After I started to show some signs of depression, he randomly hugged me and asked me if it is alright that he touches me. I didn’t object, his hug felt good. He seemed very concerned, stroking my hair (I have mid-back long dirty blonde hair) and eventually kissed me on my cheek and then on my lips. I didn’t resist. We ended up spending the night, and in the morning - I didn’t feel like shit. He cooked breakfast and laughed and made me feel at ease. I stayed with him an another night and I think that’s when we started “seeing” eachother.
He was amazing for me, emotionally and otherwise, since he was strong and confident and put my insecurities to rest when we were together. I’ve always had a small problem with hugging girls, considering them somehow ‘fragile’ so I’m afraid of holding tight or accidentally squishing their breasts or such. With him, I could do everything without having to be afraid of somehow hurting him physically. The things he did to me felt really good as - unlike your average girl - he totally knew what he was doing when it came to pleasing me. I’m pretty buff, and so was he, but emotionally he was dominant. In bed, he kept insisting that I do him and he really seemed to enjoy it, too. That’s how it usually went, though I did try it a few times myself, just to make him happy. I can’t say it felt good, even though I’ve probably never been more aroused. Nothing was forced, he always asked me if I was alright with what he was doing and kept explaining things, which was good. (“You don’t really need to go take a dump”). He loved photography and he used to take all these pictures of me. Nothing vulgar, but rather artistic shots. He kept complimenting my body and we compared and competed playfully. He was well-read and smart and goddamnit I miss him. Grhh. I’ll go grab a cup of coffee, cool down and then finish writing this.
Right… We were doing great for around one and half months. I had told him not to tell anyone and I told him I didn’t want to see his gay friends or anything and that I wanted to be with him without any of the crap that comes with it. He kept asking, but I adamantly refused. I was shy, afraid and feared being branded ‘an amateur homo’ or something. I sure as hell didn’t want some rainbow-themed welcome party celebrating my entre to queerdom.
We fell out when my condition re-surfaced and and I was hospitalized. I kept asking him to come see me, but he never did. I told him I really needed him, but he never came. “I can’t.” That’s all he said. When I asked why, he wouldn’t tell. When I got out, like three weeks later, we went to have a cup of coffee together. We were both very distant and we realized we had fallen apart. We did the “Well, if you ever wanna talk or go have a pint, you have my number.” He never called me, and I never called him. I tried to call him like three months ago and found out he had changed his number.
I’ve been unable to tell anyone else about this. I’ve was too embarrassed, I still am. Nowdays I tend to fall for girls far more often than guys, since it is far easier to find a hot girl who wants me than a decent looking who would even look my way. I don’t want to go to a gay/bi-favored club and pick up a nice guy, but I still wish I didn’t feel so goddamn anxious (or guilty because I am aroused) when a well-built guy lifts his shirt.
Why come out of the closet when you can live a happy life having partners that you desire and can fall in love with? (Meaning women, who are just as appealing to me as good looking guys.) I don’t feel like it’d be worth it, if I’m “just” bisexual… I don’t want to tell the world, but I think to accept this part of me, I must.
I miss him and I feel like shit.
That sucks. If he did something like that he probably would’ve ended up hurting you some other way soon though, I’d imagine. Dunno what to say about feeling anxious or weird about it… do it more and you’ll get used to it! :wgrin:
I don’t know his reasons, but he wasn’t being a bitch about it. He sounded really sad when he said he couldn’t come.
And why do I feel anxious? I got a very religious upbringing and thus feel that liking guys is somehow “wrong”? I don’t think so and I can rationalize it, but I feel it, I guess. I’m not religious, myself, I was just raised this way and it’s really hard to fight against such conditioning. My father most explictly stated that being gay = sin = hell. He went to stupid lengths, like cutting my long-ish hair when I was young against my will because he didn’t want his son to look like a girl or a homosexual.
I can’t really do it more. I can’t go up to a guy and be like; “Hey, I find you attractive.” I’m too shy. I can do it with girls, no problem. I’m a huge flirt. I just break down when I’d need to do it with guys. Giddy and anxious and unable to think and panic attacking. It’s as if I was asking them to be my prom date.
A few things.
I’m sorry for your experience. And weather you decide to come out or not come out you really just seem like you need a friend or friends to talk to … i hope you’ll utilize this thread in that way we’re really a great bunch of guys.
Your story hits the nail on the head with my problem with “LABELING” people. “He had sex with a guy so he’s gay” I saw him kiss a girl so he’s straight. Stuff like that can do more disservice to the subject of such discussion than anything. IMO if you are sexin it with guys and it makes you happy but you want to define your self as bisexual or straight. more power too you… Because frankly unless I am the guy you are trying to have a relationship… I really don’t give a crap what you call your self.
As for comming out. You should know that most times comming out isn’t the “I’ve had sex with enough men now so i’m gonna burst out of the closet in my peacock feathers and flags and tell everyone i’m gay”… Typically, well 99 percent of the time most people come out
cause they get tired of the lying.
So why are they always so cheerful about telling people. Well … I can tell you that first person they tell it’s not always a happy conversation. But as they tell more people and realize that it’s no big deal it’s a relief. Albeit some people really cherrish there comming out celebrating but that varies person to person… I don’t know what your experiences are with meeting gay out people aside from this guy. but I just wanted to touch on that.
As for your story and this guy. I’m glad to know you realize that part of him is hurting that he cant be with you fully …(at least from the story youtold) And if you are finding happiness with a girl as of late then please follow your heart. But It sounds like you are at a stage where you can appreciate the best of both worlds. weather that means sleeping with both sexes or just enjoying affection from both sexes is up to you.
If a guy lifts his shirt and you are aroused this isn’t new for heterosexual men. especially body builder to body builder. You gain an unmatched appreciation for the male physique as you build up your own. and most are okay with touch if you do it respectfully and discretion. I wish you luck on your journey please keep us posted.
Also if you dont mind:
What was the condition that hospitalized you?
Location?
and most importantly
Pics? :wgrin:
I have a neurocognitive deficit that manifests at times as dissociative disorder, depersonalization and other symptoms such as catatonia. I was initially diagnosed with schizophrenia but after I was sent to a neuropsychologist they changed my diagnosis. I also suffer from severe depression, severe insomnia, severe anxiety and am classified as potentially dangerous to myself and others. I was hospitalized because I had a breakdown (not his fault) and ended up trashing my place up and then wandering the streets, bloodied up from stumbling and from breaking the mirror at home.
But… I am okay most of the time, nowdays. I used to be a wreck but after six years of therapy and conditioning, I’m feeling so much better. I am incredibly glad I can work and live alone (well, with my sister) instead of living the career of a sick man all my life.
Are you asking for the location and pics of me or the location where I was hospitalized at?
But, yeah. I’m from Helsinki, Finland. I’ll get some pics later if you insist.
Please pardon me for the extremely dorky question I’m about to ask you, but I’m curious and I can’t help it.
Do you listen to metal?
Glad you are feeling better
i was asking for your current location of residence. and pics of you sweetie :wgrin::wonder:
Yes, I even play it. And my friends play it. The metal thread around here that starts with “Guyz check out Imperanon.” Heh. I basically grew up with their former guitarist, went to school with their synth player and their vocalist, their current guitarist Teemu, who also plays in Wintersun, lives like half a mile from me and we’re good friends. YES I LISTEN TO METAL.
I also listen to (nu-)jazz, classical, industrial/ebm, jungle, darkstep, digital hardcore… And then artists like Nick Cave, Johnny Cash, Leonard Cohen, etc. I mostly avoid… happy music.
Nice. :tup:
I had to ask dude, like almost all of my favorite bands are Finnish. Moonsorrow, Insomnium, Wintersun, Kalmah, Swallow The Sun (I might be wrong but I remember hearing that they’re Finnish), Sonata Arctica, Catamenia, forgive me for name dropping in the wrong thread but damn man you’re lucky to be surrounded by such awesome music.
If it wasn’t obvious enough, I play as well. You got a band?
Nothing productive at the moment. Moonsorrow/Finntroll’s Trollhorn was my band teacher in a music school and my father (priest) buried Somnium of Finntroll/Impaled Nazarene.
Insomnium is one of my favorite bands, and they -slaughtered- at Tuska Open Air. Their cover of Sentenced’s Nepenthe was so win. Let’s not get sidetracked, though.
obviously, but you expect that of Asta…whip mode>launch>serpent’s embrace>6+BK should not have been allowed!
Haha!
Yeah, Ring-out Cannon is pretty stupid.
Damn it all. I’m going to kill one of my co-workers. Bitch gave me her cold since she couldn’t close her damn mouth whenever she coughed. Now it’s doubtful I’ll see Doug for ANOTHER week.
At the very least he said he’d risk getting sick just to see me. I think I love him already. :lovin:
Actually Xianghua is the only one thats evil in SC3.