So something odd and a little humorous happened during my daily dose of Skyrim.
First off, a few days ago I started a whole new character from scratch, because I wanted to go completely stealth archer this playthrough, as opposed to the mage/stealth/archer character I started with. Figured I’d give it a try without the magic and invest more into stealth and archery, along with one-handed. So, started a whole new character (but stuck with the Dunmer, I don’t think I’ll ever stray from them in an Elder Scrolls game)and slowly but surely made my way to Riften.
Now, in my previous playthrough I got married around level 35, to Mjoll the Lioness. So since I got married so late into my playthrough I had tons of gold horded, so I immediately moved me and Mjoll to my house in Markarth, instead of staying with her in Riften. Now, as many of you know Mjoll has a ‘follower’ named Aerin who does just what his title implies. Follows her. Everywhere. I figured he would go away after me and Mjoll got married but then I find this little asshole inside my house with my wife everytime I come home. So something had to be done. Long stort short, I waited til Mjoll fell asleep then put a poisoned Elven arrow through Aerin’s heart, dragged him into that little closet the house in Markarth has, stripped him for good measure, closed the door and forgot about it. Next morning Mjoll woke up completely oblivious to the fact her follower was gone and that was that.
This playthrough, however, something very different happened.
I decided off the bat I wanted to marry Mjoll again (what can I say, that accent grew on me) so as I soon as I got to Riften I did her quest, located her sword and married her right away. I didn’t even have 5,000 gold at this point so I moved in with her, into Aerin’s house. Again, Aerin very quickly started to irritate me, so I decided to get him out of the picture early. It started out the same way as before, I waited until Mjoll went to her room to go to sleep, then I snuck into Aerin’s room and did him in while he was sleeping. Took his gold, and got up and left the room. Literally two seconds later, Mjoll jumps out of her sleep and runs into Aerin’s room and sees him dead. I’m like, “oh fuck…”…
She starts freaking out, screaming and shit. After a few seconds of that she gets up runs out of the house, so I follow her. I shit you not, she goes outside (still hysterical) and does a full circle around Riften before running back into Aerin’s house. We go back into the house and I try to talk to her to get my home-cooked meal and she says, “get out of here, I don’t feel like talking” or some shit like that. I’m like OK, thats cool. I just murdered your little homie so you don’t have to cook for me today. Tomorrow, however, you’d better have that ready or I’m taking you down a peg. So I wait 24 hours and try again. Same answer. Wait another day. Same thing. So then I wait a whole week and I still get that “get out of here” line. At that point I start weight my options.
I’ve read that Mjoll is an NPC that can’t be killed (even if she could be killed I probably wouldn’t, like I said that character grew on me), so I can’t ‘divorce’ the Skyrim way, I can go back and re-load a save and do this whole shit over again, or I could just deal with this and never progress the marriage further. The last option I’m not doing, I’d miss out on steady gold plus those home-cooked meals…so I decide to just re-load a previous save. But not before I realease some rage. So I pull out my mace and start going to town on Mjoll. I then notice she has a life bar that depletes with each hit so I think, “hey maybe she can die”. So I just keep whaling on her, blow after blow. The whole time she doesn’t raise a finger against me, but begs me to stop. It’s delicious. I relish every hit.
After a while her health bar empties and she drops to a knee, but doesn’t die. I put my mace away and step back, and after a few seconds she gets up. I decide before I re-load my save, I wanna hear what she has to say after all that fun. So I go up to her and, wouldn’t you know it, she says, " It’s good to see you again, dear." and all the marriage dialoges open up, including the free gold and home-cooked meal. :o
I make a mistake, then give her time and space enough to forgive me, and she acts like a cunt. I take an enchanted mace to the side of her head and she’s ready to cook me a meal. Amazing how life like these women in Skyrim are. Moral of the story? Force gets you what you want…also don’t try to kill Aerin inside his own home. Do it in your house.