How can I make my ***** bigger?

I know what you are thinking, and I know what you are going to say.

Angel, you are already huge, why make them bigger?

It’s not humanly possible because you can’t get the bones to grow and blah blah blah

Well I think there has to be a way for guys to be able to make their HANDS bigger throw some sort of method since I have personally known guys that have HUGE hands that weren’t born with them that way.

I got a lead on a few methods but I would like your opinion. And in case you are wondering why anyone would want bigger hands, let me just say pimping aint easy.

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Mashing SPDs with Gief makes the inner palm wider.

No seriously, My hands are already big from working out but what if I wanted to elongate the actual fingers themselves?

Maybe by using a bunch of rings or something like this?

I’d say by jerking me off, but that’d make 'em stretch out so far trying to cover all that territory, you’d be sporting penguin flippers by the time your top hand got to where it’d be getting a good rub on the underside of my shaft’s head.

Also, I question how sexy you’d look in a blue dress.

This response is much less gay than OP.

When I first saw this I was like:

Then once I read it, I was like:

inject fix a flat into it

This would imply that his doctor has both tits and a penis, as well as huge…hands, amirite?

its not the size of your hands that matter … its how much salary you make to compensate for it

amirite guys?

Also cocks

Just don’t go hiring a strapping pool boy, when you finally land that Evo Longoria, fish.

MUTHAFUCKIN CENA IN THA HOWSE! It’s me John Cena, aka J.C., aka Mr. P, aka 420 mafia up in this bitch.

If you want a big dick, don’t take supplements, or do any genital stretching methods.

Wouldn’t know, you pussed out on the pictures son :nono:

Yo yo yo, this is John Cena, aka Frosted Flakes, aka Paula Wannabe Massacre, aka 420 Mafia.

We don’t want to see that kind of shit.

im in that weird part of srk again…

I’ll teach you how to get longer fingers if you teach me how to whistle.

Man,i have seen some weird ass threads on SRK but this takes the cake lol

Just keep admirin the muscle bound beef cakes prancin around in their speedo and grapplin each others hot sweaty bodies bro.

Hey, I’m fuckin’ John Cena. I’m not like those dopey ass homos prancin around on stage like this is some kind of dinner theater.

This is some real shit what I do. I’m more real than Terry or those redneck motherfuckers from the 80’s. I"M THE REAL DEAL, I’M JOHN CENA, I rep the 420 mafia (570, smoke errday)

Plus, I see enough of that kind of shit post-matches.

But Cena isn’t good…