Did something just leak out of my brain?

For my entire life, I never cared about sports and avoided them. See, stuff like basketball, soccer, and football is just nerve-wracking for me because everybody is trying to chase one ball and I’m likely to get tackled or knocked over in all of the chaos. Whereas sports like golf and baseball are just stupidly boring. Then I realized, that just leaves Tennis. I think that is the only sport I could ever see myself playing. It involves plenty of open space, and I’m not sitting/standing around waiting for stuff to happen. And now all of a sudden, I want to play it so that I’m not spending all of my leisure time sitting on my rear doing $#&*(.

So like, where/how does a n00b play tennis solo? I have no social life and never want one. I just want to play against a brick wall.

Did I mention that brick walls make excellent, trustworthy friends?

I’ll find you a brick wall

The sport you are looking for is Squash or Racketball. You vs Wall.

There’s always golf if you’re hellbent on playing by yourself, although you’ll have to promise to not eat the golf clubs.

I do like, 700 reps of tennis every day. Usually getting like, 3, 4 hundred points each time. My uncle works for the army so I had him make me a a carbon composite tennis bat which is very similar to the stuff Navy Seals use. I used to play in a league, but they aren’t that great, I enjoy playing with myself, and showing off is a lot easier too…just show up to the court with a ripe sack and just start whacking my balls across the court with style and grace in front of these kids who barely know the game. They look up to me. Its gratifying.

Clicks thread before noticing Beguiled is the O.P.

Notices Beguiled is the O.P.

Decides not to deal in double hypotheticals

Leaves thread

Let’s gay this up! WOOT!
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I had no idea the Navy Seals had a competitive tennis league.
:xeye:

MY TURN
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reads thread title

thinks “Pics or it didn’t sap”

reads thread

:coffee: leaves

There’s a really great game I recommend to be played with a brick wall, you don’t need to do this tennis shit. All you have to do is run towards it! Can be played solo or against others, blacking out means you’ve won.

This dog could teach you a trick or two

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You…don’t say…backs out of thread