Fun topic.
"The Timeless Award"
I will go with the JLA. It’s the pantheon of gods, superhero style. All of the big archetypes in one team. We’ll just ignore the Detroit-era league… That was pre-pre-Crises, so it don’t count, right?
"The R4 Sagat Cr.F. Award"
The Authority. Apollo, the Doctor, Jenny, the Engineer, Jack Hawksmoor, and Rose Tattoo are all powerhouses. Toss in Midnighter and the Swift for support, and that’s pretty much all she wrote. Oh yeah, and they got the Carrier, which moves downwake through the Devachanic Realm at a speed of twenty-five dreams per second. Whatever that means.
**“The Cool As Ice Award” **
The Ultimates. “You think this letter on my head stands for France?” 'Nuff said.
"The OMG This Is A Waste of Paper Award"
The Ultimates 3. By Jeph Loeb and Joe Madureira. I feel like even talking about them is a waste of Internet space.
"The This Team Has Had Too Many Members Award"
It’s gotta be a toss-up between all the incarnations of the Avengers and the Justice League, right? Someone hardcore should tally up all the characters on the cover of Avengers/JLA #3.
"The Best Team Leader Award"
Cyclops. He IS the X-Men. Captain America’s deserving as well, but it’s been established that the Avengers can operate without him. The X-Men just aren’t the X-Men without Cyclops.
**“The Best Team Villain Award” **
Could be Magneto, the Injustice Gang, or even the Masters of Evil. But I think I will go with Deathstroke. You know why? Because it’s ALL SKILL, BABY. Nah, I’m just kidding. Doctor Doom all the way. Anyone else would be… UNTHINKABLE.
And, if you will indulge me, a couple more categories (probably mostly so I can namecheck my favorite comics):
"The Best Villain Team Award"
The Suicide Squad. The Suicide Squad comic brought a level of depth to a bunch of villains who were (and probably still are) considered C-listers, or maybe B-listers at best. Deadshot and Captain Boomerang, among others, really shine.
"The Best Teen Superhero Team Award"
Runaways. The Teen Titans deserve much respect but I don’t think I’ve ever read any teen superhero book as fantastic as Runaways.
"The Most Bizarre Team Award"
Grant Morrison’s Doom Patrol. Even just looking at one of the covers is enough to get you a little high. By the way, did you notice that the Doom Patrol and X-Men share a bunch of similarities? They both came out around the same time; I think maybe three months separated their debut issues. Both teams’ rosters are made up of outcasts, misfits, and freaks who fight to protect a world that hates and fears them. Both teams were founded by old dudes in wheelchairs. And Morrison revamped both books and allowed them to reach their full potential! Weird, huh?!
"The We Are Not Afraid of You and We Will Beat Your Ass Award"
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. They don’t SEEM too powerful on paper… I mean, when the team roster was a woman, an 80 year-old man, an invisible pervert, a poor man’s Hulk, and an Indian dude with a submarine, they still managed to defeat Fu Manchu and a Martian Invasion. Respect.
"The Most Subversive Superteam Concept Award"
This definitely goes to the Wildcats. They started out as a generic X-Men rip-off but eventually transformed into a superteam without a war. Then it became a superteam that wasn’t a team because they had no one to fight and all the members did their own things. And then the team sort of reformed, only now they tried to save the world by making batteries. I wish DC would let WildStorm fix itself. It’s a shame what’s happened to the Wildcats and Authority series.
"The Superteam That Made You Care"
X-Statix, baby! We laughed, we cried, we scratched our balls.
