Batman/Superman movie announced for 2016

goodm0urning · August 22, 2013, 5:16pm

When’s the last time you actually sat down and watched the 1989 Batman movie? I saw it theatrically last year (two years ago?) and time has been severely unkind to it.

I probably did a writeup of my experience somewhere on SRK. I’ll look for it.

Hell, I could probably just try to remember the number of times the guy sitting next to me said “What the fuck?” under his breath anytime something particularly absurd happened.

Louiscipher · August 22, 2013, 5:23pm

I saw it a month or so ago. It’s still pretty BA.

goodm0urning · August 22, 2013, 5:28pm

Couldn’t find them here, but here are my remarks from a different site:

Batman (1989)

A theatrical screening. Hoo, boy, this one hasn’t aged well. Having seen it many times as a child, much of this movie is committed to my memory. Even so, I was stunned at times by how often it glosses over basic issues of logic.

Why, for example, would a presumably intelligent man like Bruce Wayne jeopardize his activities or even waste his time on an overgrown child like Vicki Vale? She has to be one of the least-interesting and less-intelligent women in the city, and her primary mode of expression is a mixture of whimpering and staring blankly. Their romantic scenes together resemble children playacting.

Bruce Wayne is probably the only billionaire who lives in Gotham. He is important enough that they reserve a seat for him at official police press conferences, and they notice when he’s gone. So why, then, would anybody not recognize him by face, and why would anyone have to dig into the newsroom’s oddly slim morgue file to find out the most important basic facts of his life?

Why, even, is he so hellbent on saving Gotham? The film rarely wastes its time on the apparently unimportant daily lives of Gothamites, unless they’re getting mugged. When it does bother to show them, they’re scrambling over each other through gutters littered with dollar bills, clinging to their unearned cash while being gassed to death in a stupidly obvious ploy by the Joker. I can’t fathom Batman’s opinion of the citizens, because the film apparently finds them despicable. Heath Ledger’s Joker would love it here.

Why have an armored car armed with machine guns and bombs in a town primarily beset by wallet snatchers and petty gangsters? Why have a jet that’s apparently constructed from dynamite and can be shot down with one well-placed gunshot? Why do the police think that the perfect place for a shootout is a rickety chemical plant filled with poisonous fumes? Why does Jack Palance constantly look and sound as if he’s about to vomit?

The film is at its best in the precious few moments when it abandons the fragile illusion of coherence. In these moments, it attains something closer to dream logic. Images and music are combined in ways that don’t necessarily make rational sense, but awaken a sort of primitive unease, a sense of tension that emanates directly from the lizard portion of our brains. When the Batman is holding Jack over the railing with the bubbling toxic gunk far below in the background of the shot, the situation is fairly simple, but the mood is odd. You can’t read Batman’s face. Is he hoisting Jack or is he dangling him? He’s a nightmare apparition, betraying not a hint of emotion or personality. The music, the angles, and Jack’s contorted expression of pain and terror tell us that he’s an unknowable force with the power of life or death. Later, circus music plays as the Joker waltzes with Vicki, while the badly wounded Batman tangles with faceless thugs in the extreme foreground. The cathedral bell tower setting is reduced to expressionistic flashes of shadows and shapes. Again, nightmare imagery.

In these moments, the movie works, but they can’t tell a complete story on their own. Cue the childish and hole-ridden narrative, which glues those moments together and ultimately sinks this movie. Taken as a whole, it is ultimately about the game of childish one-upmanship between Batman and the Joker, with the Joker being constantly frustrated by the apparent ease of his playmate’s better success. Gotham is the playground and the hapless idiot citizens are the toys.

Don_Barracuda · August 22, 2013, 8:12pm

Kim Basinger played the damsel in distress so well

Dragonfave723 · August 23, 2013, 5:15am

Affleck is the new Batman!

Foolinfection · August 23, 2013, 5:35am

Somewhere…Kevin Smith is grinning his fat ass off right now.

Saitsu · August 23, 2013, 5:46am

The one time SuperTroll’s annoying ass bitching is actually valid.

Affleck? Really?!

SuperTroll · August 23, 2013, 5:51am

I have nothing to say about this because some of you guys enable shitty choices like this by constantly justifying the butcher jobs on comic movies with"well it’s trying to be something different".

You guys supported iron man 3 so now…your getting the hero you deserve.

Saitsu · August 23, 2013, 5:54am

Even if all of SRK denounced every single Comic Movie in history, they’d still be killing it at the box office. So don’t blame us asswipe.

kitsunisan · August 23, 2013, 6:00am

It was considered a direct sequel to Superman 2, which is why you get Lex obsessed with owning land and knowing exactly where the Fortress of Solitude is. Just keep in mind it’s pre-Crisis DC. I just watched the first Superman and the Richard Donner cut of the second one, if you watch Returns after that you understand the direction they were taking. The first two movies had little in the way of action, they were about Superman being human.
I guess that’s why I like Returns more than most people here. I grew up with Reeves as Superman, and this is the type of movie I remember seeing. Yes, it’s cheesy as hell at times, but it actually deals with characters, not how many buildings they can blow up.

VagrantLest · August 23, 2013, 6:00am

I don’t really mind Ben here but he better get in shape, he can’t phone it in like Daredevil.

Gimpy · August 23, 2013, 6:00am

I’m going to keep an open mind about Affleck being Batman. At least he’s american. LOL!!!

Hawkingbird · August 23, 2013, 6:05am

Affleck was ass as Daredevil. He has no business being Batman

Kim_Sue-il · August 23, 2013, 6:07am

http://i.minus.com/iAhtlqVc7KYyQ.gif

Epoch_Masamune · August 23, 2013, 6:17am

“Remember Heath” thats all we have now. thats all we have…walks away…

True_Grave · August 23, 2013, 6:24am

The only way he can pull off Batman/Bruce Wayne, is to pull a Chris Evans. As in, I want to see previews and be like, “WTF? I can’t believe thats really ben Affleck!”

If he can’t do that. Then its over. Like other actors such as Tom Cruise and Nic Cage, he is one of those actors that can only ever do 1 character: Ben Affleck. If thats what people like, then cool. But this is the one movie he absolutely cannot do that in. Because Ben Affleck does NOT equal Bruce Wayne. Just like it did not equal Daredevil!

Its such idiotic, chilidish, and impulsive decisions by DC-Hollywood, which is why Justice League will look like an Avengers bootleg when it arrives.

Dangerous_J · August 23, 2013, 6:37am

I almost thought it was April 1 when I saw the announcement.
Honestly, I thought Affleck was done with acting and was going the director route permanently, given his Argo success.

Someone was speculating Benedict Cumberbatch was going to be revealed as Bats; I would have been happy with him.

Oh well, C’est la vie

Kusanagi02 · August 23, 2013, 6:45am

All you need is Bryan Cranston as Lex Luthor and you’re set for huge profit. I mean can you imagine Lex Luthor going up to Superman and saying “Tread Lightly”. Guarantee EVERYONE will mark out.

HD-Man · August 23, 2013, 6:50am

Affleck is a decent actor, but he will most likely be a shitty Batman/Bruce. I’m just not seeing it right now

Jack_Frost · August 23, 2013, 7:01am

CROFL