Yep, that’s pretty much me. The only games I’ve even been able to bring myself to play lately are fighters (Kof13, 3S, Last Blade2, SamSho) and usually I pause like every 2 minutes because I lose interest. Drinking when I’m bored is pretty regular for me, I know it shouldn’t be, but its a lot less stressful than drinking with friends because the most I usually do is just blair music too loud or something. I’m usually quick to jump into activities that involve drinking just because bitches are predators and I never minded that too much lol but some of my friends kinda realize I’m having trouble and have us do stuff we can enjoy sober and I really appreciate that
I think I’ll do that actually, I’m usually not one for meditation but I think it could help, I was in Detroit half this year and I biked everywhere because it’s pretty flat there but I’ve been off of it since I got back to Nebraska (Hills. Everywhere.). Now would probably be a good time to pick up waking instead. And yeah I agree I should should make more of an attempt to ring off it slowly, it’s just that after I have a bit, Drunklittlebirdy feels like it’s a great idea to grab another 40 (and hit up his ex on facebook lol). I’ll try to be more conscious of it though.
2 years ago I was depressed, homeless, unemployed and spent New Years day in the hospital after getting beaten up by the police in a drug induced psychotic state.
Today I have a pretty good job, a wonderful girlfriend, spend my free time doing martial arts and am generally pretty at peace with my life.
To everyone struggling this Christmas season, you can get through it, I know because I have.
@Korbidon What was your break? Like you luck out or what? Either way nice to see somebody on the up. Sad when you read too many dudes as miserable as yourself lol.
Meeting my girlfriend changed my life. She wanted to be with me despite the fact I was a sad, sorry sack who hadn’t worked for a year. I had to be better for her, so from that moment on, everything I did was to improve myself. I got a shitty job paying way below minimum wage, but used that to build into something that I could work off.
Now I make enough that I could take care both of us if she needed too.
I stopped doing drugs and alcohol, changed my diet, exercised and found a healthy way to deal with my copious amount of anger. I still go through bad patches, but this is kids stuff compared to what used to happen.
I used to get violent, suicidal urges that would be triggered by virtually nothing and have to physically contain myself somewhere. I used to get vicious, vicious nightmares. I used to get such anxiety in public that it would make me visibly shake.
All of that has changed for the better. I feel like a different person.
Fs, you just manned up basically? That’s pretty incredible. Actually that’s some inspirational shit, I ain’t homeless bit am defo gonna take the same medicine.
I’ve been up and down lately. Feeling resentment from someone I hold dear fucks with my head cause the good memories that blinded me are tearing away. I know what I need to do, but I’m too pussy to do it.
Simply letting go of the good time memories (and letting go of the one you hold dear) you have with someone that you love but who has also hurt you is the solution, Neesa, but it will take time and I feel you are likely on the right track and you know what to do. Eventually, your attachment to the good memories will fade which will result in making your resentment disappear.
I’ve found cutting people off helps, the good and the bad. You can’t cut everyone off or you’ll be very lonely but if you build a strong enough case in your head you shouldn’t feel regret about letting them go and if you can find peace with that, you’ll find peace with the rest. Letting go can be a really hard thing sometimes but it’s a big world with a lot of different people in it and no matter what you do you can’t force people to like you and you can’t force people to stay likeable.
I actually spend most of my time alone and I totally don’t mind it at all. I enjoy my alone time and we should all do that, but that is your option to take.
I’m a social person by nature. If I’m not talking with people in the real world, I talk online, I work with people. I was more referring to letting go of people that continually walk over you and disrespect you. If there is an unequal amount of good and bad, past good doesn’t make up for the continual bad. If there is some really strong connection there maybe they’ll float back into your life eventually but the best thing to do when someone is being abusive to you is just to let go. If you’re fine not being around people at all, more power to you, I’m a big believer in doing what you want, not what people tell you is normal and if you want to be alone, go for it.
Just want to let you guys know that I love you all and even though you are only E-people, I think about you guys all the time. and wouldn’t hesitate to help out most of you in any way I could. You know who you are (some possibly don’t)
That said, I’ve never had to deal with depression and I don’t think I’m under going it now. But… I’m perhaps the happiest I’ve ever been and I’m completely frightened that I’m going to fuck it up. Fear anxiety and stress are my demons. Adding optimism to the mix makes me dangerous. I’m the sort that will procrastinate after I’ve gotten myself set on fire, thinking that at least the fire’s only up to my knees.
That said… my family makes me angry. I know it’s not their fault, but I’m also very fearful of looking forward to having to press the shut-off valve for my life. Friends, family, everything I know just gone… poof!
Like I said, I am happy. I have my mental freedom and my kids, but just knowing that’s in my future is really, really stressful. Lately, I’ve been having to actively work at being relaxed. It’s not a natural state for me, something that I now realize is probably a result of having to constantly look over my shoulder in that stupid ass religion that’s caused me so much damage. Literally every part of my life has been under constant scrutiny, or at least it felt that way. So I’m getting used to just being chill and relaxed, not having to worry about who or what sees or hears what I do and say.
I feel fortunate, though, compared to some of the things I hear on here. So, I wish all of you the best and offer an ear to anyone who ever needs to talk. Just PM me or whatever.
Good post. To be clear, I like to socialize as well, but I keep it to a minimum and I pick and choose to socialize with the people I feel comfortable with. I tend to socialize out of boredom.
Anyways to help homies out- you guys ever tried a completely different hobby besides vidjahgames or booze? I’m a gamer myself and will always be till the end but I’ve been expanding my hobby for awhile now and I find it really helps a lot.
My suggestion: try something that’s completely out of the ‘norm’ in your situation once in a while. The first ‘out-of-the-norm’ thing I did was try a beginner hiphop class(which is hilarious since i generally hate the hiphop genre growing up). But what do u know, I’m actually good at it and the new friends i met from there are chilled as fuck. Ever since then, I tried myriad of things: volunteer at local soup kitchen, archery, buy/learn acoustic guitar(this one was tough because I had to save up for 6 months to afford the one I like), volunteered for a week at an organic farm(one of the best vacation ever; made me appreciate food even more), surfing(why the fuck i didn’t learn this earlier? Now I look forward to summer season!) etc.
I know most of the time you need to spend $$$ to try something new but not always. You can visit local library and pick up new hobby book. Whatever it is the important thing is YOU need to initiate it; do it to prove to yourself, not to anyone. Set simple goals in your life and work from there. We all have our demons but it shouldn’t take over your life.
My goal next year is to learn Spanish on my own so I can understand what local the taco truck guys be chatting about whenever some fine women be passing by :lol:. Also planning to get a bonzai tree in my room and see how far I can maintain it this time.
I’m kind of the same way you are and I’m going through a situation of cutting someone off right now that just sucks. It’s an ex basically and I did a lot of work on my own to be able to try to be a friend to her after we broke up because she doesn’t have a lot of people she can trust and count on, but it’s just too hard. We haven’t really been talking which i know is the best move but it’s hard to not want to hit her up. Even now I think about her a good bit, just small things bring up stuff, and it messes with my mood. I know I’ll get there and maybe we’ll actually be able to be friends in the future but you’re 100% right, sometimes you just have to let someone go, at least for awhile.
Being friends with exes never works. Either you’ll get jealous when they see someone or they’ll get jealous when you do. It’s always a competition to make out that one is doing better than the other one as well and if you’ve got more success than them, they resent it. Love and hate tend to be two pretty closely linked emotions, the more you love someone the more you tend to hate them when things don’t work out.
I’m actually quite good friends with mine, at first we were at each others throat but we got over it shrugs I’m even seeing her tonight for her birthday party at a hotel. It can work, just have to be understanding and let go of any bullshit that doesn’t matter anymore
