I’m not particularly great at this, but I’m glad to see people helping each other out 
You’re not alone at allll. I have an issue with getting black out dunk… Last weekend I completely ruined stripper friends party and I woke up with some guy asking me “I’d there something like, mentally wrong with you? I mean, nobody could be that stupid”…i lost a WHOLE day and I still have no idea what happened…i went home and was having panic attacks back to back until the day before yesterday. The reason I even got that far is because large groups (subconsciously, even though I’m aware what happened after the fact) freak me out and when there’s alcohol… Yeah… This whole week I’ve been trying to calm my head but the worst case scenario always pops into it. My eating habits have been crap, my sleep is 100% nightmares, but it gets better with time. The girl that threw it messaged me and I still don’t even know what to say… It was"I still love you" buy idek what I did to need that reassurance… This forum helps me a lot honestly, and even though it might not be the “proper” thing to do. It’s good to know you’re acceptable by the general public. And you are here man. This too shall pass~
Ps. I literally think I broke my right nut fucking around on her stripper pole. I haven’t felt it since. They’re are dumber people. lol
Can’t wait to see my mutant ass kids.
yeah but no one REALLY know how I “react” or much about anything lol…
if you’re talking about the ADHD test, the questions are somewhat basic…shit like being unable to sit still, crazy attention to detail, listening skills, etc.
The breakup with my ex has been really hard. That relationship, as well as the therapy I’ve been doing has definitely changed me, and im not sure if the changes are entirely positive or not. It may just be me being afraid of change, or it may just be lingering negativity as a result of the end of the relationship and me trying to not take on some of her negative characteristics, but I’m not sure if I’m quite in a good place yet or not. Things are getting better but I feel detached from everything sometimes. It comes and goes. It’ll be this overwhelming feeling of grief for a bit and then I snap out of it, and it can change in the course of minutes. It’s frustrating because I don’t know what it is or why it’s happening.
Still, it’s good to be around my family and friends for Christmas. One thing im grateful for is that I do have a good family that I don’t hate and that doesn’t drive me away. Merry Christmas guys. Feel better.
As negative as this sounds, it’s nice to see that a lot of us aren’t alone in our struggles. The last year and a half has been really hard for me, but I’m working on it…
I blame the pollution in our shitty town, for our struggles.
I used to get anxiety attacks (my first ever experience) about 2 months ago but then they stopped, and not sure why. Hope for the best for you man.
Thanks, man. Anxiety attacks are fucking horrible. My attacks lasted for hours. They felt like Hell.
Yup the cause is adhd and not your cocaine addiction…the obvious solution is more drugs…
Gonna make an entry here just so I can reflect on it this time next year.
Got too many negative emotions tho there is no real cause for it. Am a working mook in his 30s dealing with the same shit every other man has to deal with. Gonna work on a positive attitude and see what changes, being a cynical asshole has too many limits on life opportunities.
You know, I’ll bet there ARE reasons for your cynicism, it’s just that you don’t know what they are yet. If you can swing it, it might be a good idea to get with a therapist and try to figure it out. Being mindful about stuff like that can help but I think figuring out the root causes may help make that easier.
One of the things i’ve been working on this year has been trying to man up. I’ll bet a lot of dudes here, especially those of us that are in our 30’s, probably still feel like boys in a lot of ways, and still do things that got us what we needed and wanted when we were in our teens and 20’s. But once you hit your 30’s the game changes a bit and doing some of those same things just doesn’t work anymore.
I don’t think there are a lot of good male role models in our society these days and I also think “becoming a man” is harder nowadays because we don’t have a lot of the rites of passage that tribal cultures had. There’s no one to tell you HOW to do it and it’s something that happens at a different time for everyone. For awhile that was sort of fucking with me mentally, but I feel like even though I’m not all the way there yet, I’ve got a bit of a better handle on it and it’s helped my state of mind some.
I accept my cynicism. I got treated like absolute shit most of my entire life. Abusive family, asshole dude-bro’s in high school, dickhead nobody bosses with little man syndrome at shit tier jobs.
So now I just act like an asshole, because it seems to be the way of the world.
Yeah, BUT, when you do that, you’re basically just doing other people the way you got done. How does that make anything any better? It sucks that you got treated that way and that it molded you the way it has, but if you’ve just resigned yourself to that, how does that make you any better than the people who treated you like shit?
oh, when I meet u and all that shit, I’m generally a nice guy. A little too nice.
But the moment you make me hate you, I spit venom. I don’t give second chances anymore, since they always end the same way.
Thats like me… sorta. I flash one of my guns and a nigga never comes back. pussies
Im still depressed. Im glad no one has come calling. Im in the mood to shoot a motherfucker. No joke.
Depressions and anxiety have been kicking my ass lately. Unless its in person I can barely even hold a solid conversion with anyone including some of my best friends. I think I’m shutting myself out because lately I’ve been drinking more than usual… Either that or I’m drinking more than usual because I feel somewhat shut out. When I do go out is usually the same shit; drink until we’re all out or the bars close; once we start, we keep it rolling, which leads to me doing some DUMB shit. I still feel like a total idiot for the last time and have been having panic attacks (that I usually drink to get out of) daily since. I know I shouldn’t, but I’ve been beating myself up even though who I was with said they forgave me. The obvious thing that needs to happen it’s either quit drinking or work better on strict limitations, but it’s been tough for me.
Yeah, I’ve been trying to convince my friends to do less drinking involved activities. Too much beer + sports nonsense. I don’t feel like that kinda guy. Although I do tend to drink out of boredom far too often. And because all my friends are social drunks, and booze is generally around or offered.
I’m bored of everything, at times. Like I have a huuuuuuge Steam backlog, and I just don’t care to play any games. I just play the same few games. It’s been awhile since I played a game with an actual ending, and got to the ending. Installed Witcher 2 twice, and got to the last chapter, and gave up twice. Tried to beat Skyrim twice, just gave up on characters, forgot what was going on, didn’t care bla bla bla. Doubt I’ll finish Fallout 4.
Is this what getting old is? Fuck 
You should try mediation, long walks, and consciously correcting your negative thinking into positive thinking. Yeah, that sounds so simple, but the idea is doing it bit by bit, more and more throughout a span of time without forcing yourself until you get to the point of being balanced and feeling good and peaceful. The end result is being natural with yourself.
Actually, everybody here should try what I just said.
I am still working on myself. I am getting better and believe I will eventually make it. The power of belief is very strong they say and I believe it.