Hello everyone, Dai here with another night of Fire Pro action! Tonight, I’ll be announcing with…NO. I didn’t invite him! How’d he get on my…fuck this, I’m out. leaves table as crowd murmurs.
I didn’t invite you. How’d you get here, and how’d you get on my list.
“Maybe if you’d get off the internet once in a while you’d learn something”
I’ll remember this…
“Hello everyone I’m Michael Cole here, reporting alone because someone apparently can’t stand me. So the first match of the night here seems to be…ooo The Big Show versus…Bryan Danielson…wait DANIEL BRYAN? Seriously? How’d he get invited to be apart of this tournament of the greatest of all time? Man he really is on the internet too much”.
MC: And look at the Big Show dominating, Danielson can’t compete with that, he’s never fought someone as big as The World’s Largest Athlete, look at that. Completely grounded. And there’s a Showstopper, VINTAGE Big Show right there. Cover, 1, 2, 3…WAIT SLOW ASS REF! No way he could have kicked out of it for real. And now Show’s exhausted? phew Knockout Blow right there, now that’s a 3 count. Big Show takes it, never a doubt in my mind. Check it out here: [media=youtube]ZxG8cMuCMGA[/media]
Danielson slowly gets up as Show leaves, notices Cole at the announcers table and takes the mic.
BD: What are YOU doing here? I thought this was a place for legends, not ass kissers.
MC: And I thought only good wrestlers were allowed here
[media=youtube]K_IVppjwpRg#t=0m55s[/media] (this is my theme song for now :P, anyway I enter with a clipboard)
Me: SECURITY!
from the crowd in the back, the amazing security force consisting of Andre the Giant and Giant Baba walk over the barricade and lift up Michael Cole by each arm.
MC: What’s the meaning of this? I thought you wanted to forbid wrestlers to attack personnel?
Me: Looking over my list of commentators, I was right…you’re, not surprisingly, not on here. To be safe, I’ve checked all my staff, and you’re not on there. Which makes you a trespasser cheers. I’ve thought of something fairly fitting. If you would please Andre?
Andre takes Michael, carrying him into the ring and holds him, arms behind back. The crowd, getting the idea, starts chanting…YOU’RE GONNA GET YOUR FUCKING HEAD KICKED IN. Hearing the chants, Danielson can only do one thing…
Me: Now that all is right with the world, I’m going to go back over there. I want to apologize for my ticket holders and those watching at the computer screens they had to go through that, but I hope this was worth it. cheers from the crowd, as I pass Danielson as he leaves, shakes his hand.
Well let’s get back to the action. Next on the card we got John Morrison vs. Owen Hart. Certainly a dream match anywhere else, but to Fire Pro? A reality. Woah! Great match! Such agility! Such technical prowess! 2.9 after 2.9! Sharpshooter! HE BROKE FREE! Morrison seems a bit out now…a rollup! Owen takes it! A must watch! [media=youtube]baAzqtZi5_g[/media]
Now for a match most wouldn’t expect here, Taka Michinoku vs. THE Brian Kendrick. I don’t think Kendrick’s taking his opponent too seriously, and from his WWE time, who would? Wow Taka dominating. No, Kendrick’s coming back, 2.9 from no where! And there’s a Michinoku Driver, pinfall win for Taka! Evil triumphs over…whatever he is (other than THE Brian Kendrick). See it here: [media=youtube]EPqqmRCBbgg[/media]
Finally, we have a favorite, HHH, vs. Bison Smith. HHH looks to end it early with a Pedigree…no Smith reverses. WOW. Smith saying you will NEVER bury me. Ouch. Bisontennial! He’s done it! Bison Smith upsets HHH! Only in Fire Pro! Only one place to catch it: [media=youtube]R0RVP9m1tXY[/media]
Tune in next time (may not be daily…but tomorrow looks good) for forks, cutters, and maybe even some criticals!
