Plz note : This thread is intended mostly for humorous purposes. It’s entirely your own fault if you this thread makes you salty and cry for me to be banned/infracted/sent to another dimension. This article will contain many logical fallacies and biases; thus does not try to present itself as a serious argument.
Quake and other arena shooters: Arena shooter strategy is little much more than RTS strategy simplified so children and fragheads can understand it. There are very few resources to collect and strategic options whatsoever. For example, if you know your opponent took the Red Armor you know to go after the Mega Health and then wait for Quad Damage because that’s basically your only good option in that scenario. Arena shooters can basically be summed up as a MOBA on a map the size of a closet. Some people will play Instagib or Clan Arena because apparently what little strategy there is is too much for them. When confronted about the genre’s apparent lack of depth, they’ll bring up the difficulty of execution, because everyone knows giving your game difficult execution prevents it from being playable by simians (no hard feelings rhythm game players, you guys get a free pass for keeping arcades alive). When arena shooter loyalists claim to be superior to other fps players because they have to lead their rocket launcher shots, they forget that shmup players have been doing that since the dawn of time. A shot in Space Invaders travels a hell of a lot slower in relation to a rocket launcher shot. In fact, as far as I know, first person shooters and third person shooters are the only genres of games that even have hitscan weapons! Not that any of this talk of leading shots matters, because at high level play, direct confrontations pretty much go into lightning guns fights. The rocket launchers only come out if the other guy goes behind a player’s back and they have trouble clicking on the guy (lol).
Counter-Strike: Some crazy ass modders looked at the concept of Quake and decided to remove on-map resources, any mobility whatsoever, and add instant-kill hitscan weapons. As a result, Counter-Strike plays out like an elaborate game of hide and seek with a bomb to be used as bait. Eastern Europeans Counter-Strike’s dedicated community try to claim their game is superior to every fps on the market that plays exactly the same because the guns bob up when you fire them. OMG HAXORZ!1!1!
Halo: Pretty much just like the arena shooters except this game takes place in space and the players move like it too. Also one of the first fps games to aim for the player almost entirely to compensate for their gimped aiming device. Whoever thought fps games on consoles were a good idea probably also thought flying games should be played with a steering wheel. I’m a god at playing Ace Combat with my Thrustmaster yo.
Call of Duty: Someone at Infinity Ward thought it was a good idea to take the generic military Counter-Strike formula that every other shooter was using and mix it with the complete and utter randomness of Goldeneye. And somehow it actually fucking worked. Scarily in fact. Also almost solely responsible for ruining the skill level of a generation of gamers. Apparently Mario didn’t dumb down the difficulty of arcade games enough so COD decided to go one step beyond. With the amount of practice it takes to play fighting games or even arena shooters at a casual level, one can consistently put up dream team scores in your average pub and upload it to Youtube to get a million views.
Battlefield: Battlefield was once a decent series that could stand up on its own. That was until someone high up at EA saw Call of Duty and decided it didn’t have enough DLC, vehicles, exploding buildings, military porn, linear campaigns, or machine crippling graphics. This individual at EA proceeded to make DICE ruin their treasured franchise with this bastard offspring of COD. Suprisingly, this also worked with shitloads of Battlefield fanboys spending all their free time comparing their game to COD because of their inherent insecurities.
Team Fortress 2: Hats. That is all.
