I keep seeing people say that Ed isn’t my character
Who the fuck is my character then
'Cause I don’t feel like anyone else fits me right now
Better question; what kind of player do you see me as
Problem is people here haven’t been doing that. They just say shit like “you’re good” when it just isn’t true. You’re the only one who’s pointed that kind of thing out.
I don’t care if people watch my replays after the fact, I just don’t want to be on stream when I’m playing someone online.
…how did you know that was me in GG pools. No one there spoke to me.
But regardless, to clarify, I just don’t like being on random streams when I’m playing online. Online gets me aggravated no matter what 'cause it’s just me sitting in front of a screen with no real interactions with the other players. I don’t like speaking or interacting much, but just having other real people there either behind me watching or just having a real player next to me is calming. 'Cause I know no matter what we can always just laugh about it, shake hands, and know we had a good time no matter how frustrating it may have been in the moment.
Playing online removes any kind of interaction like that and just makes everything feel…I dunno. I just get irritated extremely quickly. Streams in this situations just amplify that 'cause now I’ve got people watching me that I can’t interact with at all in the moment, not just the player I’m fighting. Be that just looking behind me, smiling, shaking my head, whatever. All of that is gone. Just people watching me be bad at the game.
Voice chat doesn’t help me either. I barely speak at all, I mostly convey things with body language/facial expressions, especially when playing sets. You can’t really replicate that stuff online in the same way.
Potentially being on stream in a tourney bothers me less 'cause while there’s far more random people watching, there’s still all those real people around me. Makes it matter less.
I dunno, that all probably sounds silly but that’s just how I react to these situations. I don’t think that’s something I can just “fix.”
Also I’m probably gonna start wearing something like that hood anyway 'cause I look ugly as sin and I don’t need people seeing that on a stream but that’s another matter entirely