Shaft gonna be wearing an eye patch like Duckie. At best.
only beans I can stomach are garbanzo beans. dont give me the shits/fart and healthy protein source.
eh, the “kids addicted to porn?!” story on Drew’s show wasn’t as insane/entertaining as I thought it would be. It’s an inevitable thing though, so the ranting and raving on shows like this by older generations that have become the classic “THERE IS TO BE NO FUN HERE.” fuddy duddys…none of that ever matters. It’s not even like this shit is new… the only difference is that porn is more easily acquired now. Older generations of kids eventually found dad or grandpa’s old “special” magazines, or certain “special” tapes in their collections, I’m sure.
heh, that reminds me…first (officially) pornographic images I saw was some random “dirty” magazine on the ground at school…and that was around 4th or 5th grade if I recall. I’ll bet some older teens at the time specifically left it there because they knew it would be funny (and “a very special moment”) for some kids to discover that, and probably see titty/pussy/ass for the first time.
*edit… I think that magazine I saw at school that magical day happened to be an issue of Penthouse.
ah the memories… later on I’d be one of those kids trying to see the titties and ass through the distortions of scrambled cable channels. Yes, I even recorded some of the action from scrambled channels.
Dominoes sucks at cutting onions. Pizza Hut has them beat in that regard. First off, they use red onion opposed to white/yellow. Also, they slice them, not chopped. Dominoes cuts them the way I do when I don’t GAF.
http://forums.shoryuken.com/themes/Shoryuken/design/inc/emoticons/smilies/mad.gif
Margaret is back, though. I don’t know how long the life of these spiders are, but she is about nom all my bug problems away and I’m glad she’s back again for the warm weather. I mowed the grass yesterday and shit was like Pokemon or something.
You are good man. Hey maybe you’ll see Bobby Lashley
lol just remembered something. speaking of dirty mags. me and a friend asked some dude to buy some(because we were like 12 or something) and the dude turns out to be a priest looking like sam jackson. gave us a speech about how bad/wrong pron is… 
I am just tryna get some of dat juggs mag bruh. don’t need all dat religion/jesus.
You know you wanted dat Swank mag, Snaaaake. Don’t lie.
My novel might institute a new unit of measurement: the Maryfull. That’s roughly equivalent to 4 Motherloads.
Been on a diet. Looking at this frozen pizza in a way I haven’t looked at food since I was a fat stoner
Edit: that first bite. 1/3rd Banderas gif
Yo, girl I am seeing got me a sanic amiibo because I couldn’t find any.
So awesome, gotta go fast.
?
Infiltration stream monstering random shit.:
Korea hates your game.
I think I just fucked up The Universe. Shit. Anyone got Neil DeGrasse Tyson’s number? Or Lawrence Krauss’? This could be serious. Help please.
Just scored 76 dollars worth of ribs for 18 bucks.
You did us all a favor. Just sit back and enjoy one last beer before existence ends.
Man, you deserve it. I’m going to bed. Based vodka.
…Barely over 1500 calories for the day!
haha I remember now… scrambled channel was SPICE. I haven’t had a premium cable tv subscription in so long, I’m not sure if Spice is even still around. There was also “Adam & Eve” channel if I recall…in addition to random PPV and Playboy channel.
…but for those with access to just normal premium stuff, Cinemax came through with TONS of softcore “material” on weekend nights…hell yeah those were the days…my baby Shannon Tweed being one of my favorite Legends in the “erotic thriller” category… I couldn’t get enough of that shit. Night Eyes 3 (my absolute favorite of Ms. Tweed’s work)… then you have quality shit like Voyeur Beach… oh yeah and the greatest Women-In-Prison film–Chained Heat 2. (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106539/ Yes, I have it on dvd.)
Meanwhile on HBO… they had an inferior selection, with that show Real Sex being really the best they had to offer. I miss that old theme… I found it one time but somehow lost it. Of course it’s a difficult track to find because the title of the show is the most generic shit ever that will of course yield trillions upon trillions of results on the net. Anyway, the combined might of Cinemax and HBO back in those days was probably responsible for entire oceans of loads being shot off in households across America at the time.
I have wine and a giant ant tried to drink it with me. I should have known something was wrong then. Do you think there’s time to finish the bottle? I’d hate to see it go to waste. Oh, and then I’d like to wipe my DNA off the glass I’m using. I wouldn’t want to be cloned when the future age discovers my perfectly mummified corpse sitting in front of one of those Compu-portal thingies that were so popular in our time.
I’m also completely naked.
I commend people who practice MMA because that shit is brutal. I never wanted to get into it because I know once I lose a tooth I’m not getting it back (can’t walk around looking like a crack head, my smile is gorgeous…as far as I’ve been told).
Tonight at work, I had to follow one of the drunken hobos that hang outside our store, and he came up to us to tell us that he needed immediate medical attention because “his hernia opened”. Also had to work with one of the newer guys who switched from the morning stock crew to recovery. We have a visit tomorrow and the store has to look perfect, and while I’m putting away returns my manager told me to help him out and teach him how to recover the area he was going to work in and put away the items he had in said area. He does so, but doesn’t recover, and come back with, “You told me to go recover, but I couldn’t find any”.
This negro asked about five times how to do things, never did his work, kept complaining about having to stay until 10PM knowing he had to, and lied saying he had to catch a bus before telling the manager his ride was here. I couldn’t even get my work done because this tool had me checking in my manager to see if he could leave, and once he could leave, I rushed his ass out. He called the store as we’re leaving to apologize, but my manager didn’t give a shit, and I hung the phone.
@Manx I was walking through the living room while it was dark and stepped on my dog’s toy and it hurt my foot. Pretty sure if you didn’t fuck up the universe it wouldn’t have happened.
Both quantum mechanics and I say screw you for that.
@Million the soft core stuff was so much better than straight up porn. YEah, HBO sucked. You HAD to have Cinemax to get the quality stuff.
Also, I fucking hate this book already, which is a good sign. I should have known tackling The Bible would be both trivial and dick-stompingly frustrating all at the same time. I’m fully aware of the differences between Mary Madelene and Mary, the mother of Jesus (Oh, and interesting side note, it seems that the latter Mary also may have had a sister, possibly a sister-in-law, also named Mary. Something about these Marys…), but they both work together so well for what I’m attempting to do, so I may just blur them, which has definitely been done before.
My work is cut out for me if I’m even going to attempt this story, but this is my favorite part of starting a book: research. I gotta read the Talmud and the Qur’an for some varying viewpoints. Very interesting project so far.
Oh, and I put the giant ant outside if anyone’s wondering.