It gets easier with time…you learn who your real friends are…and the ones that you thought would never accept you or homosexuality, learn to accept it. Well, this isn’t always the case, but it was true when I came out to all my friends on SRK…most of which I play 3s with in real life. This is my infamous thread…since you’re new I doubt you’ve seen it. http://forums.shoryuken.com/showthread.php?t=125935
When I told my dad I kind had too…long story…it’s never been brought up since, and it’s probably for the better. But I might add that he still makes gay jokes and anti gay comments when I’m around…but he’s kind of a douche anyways, so it’s like whatever.
No. Fat little 15 year olds with snaggleteeth had better not be anybody here’s tastes…
Right on, I’d never come out to a hispanic or asian family, no racism meant with the comment though (and a lot of other families, stereotypical hispanic/asian families just come to mind). Just doesn’t seem worth the hassle. Well, at least not the part about dating way older guys. I don’t think I’ll really be able to tell my parents how old my boyfriend is… They’re not intrusive or anything so I doubt they’d be like “OMG WELL I HAVE TO MEET YOUR BOYFRIEND.” or anything. Good luck, man.
Coming out seems scary and intense, but like Jaime said it gets easier with time especially when you realize that in some ways it’s a blessing. I like to be able to just bam tell if someone’s worth my time. If I tell them I’m gay and they’re not supportive or don’t accept it, I’m completely fine with that because that means I didn’t want to be associating with them in the first place. Fuck the haters, I couldn’t care less what they think. For me, though, coming out has been met with surprise and disbelief. Not bad disbelief, they just won’t believe me! They’re like haha yeah right you’re fucking with me! :lol: It’s always been either that or just “Oh, wow. Really? Huh. Never really… guessed. But now that I think about it, I did kinda wonder why you never had girlfriends around even though hella chicks were into you.”
I’ve still not even had any problems telling straight guys, which is pretty much the only demographic that starts problems over this kind of thing. Nobody at SRK has ever acted any different knowing or seemed to even care at all (which is a good thing)… Haven’t told that many people though, just my close friends. It’s not obvious to the naked eye so I don’t see the point in just going around telling everyone. I’m up front with it too, when people inquire, I tell them.
EDIT: Coming out to closer friends/relatives is easier than just telling random obviously homophobic people, if you ask me. Real friends and close relatives are just like “Okay. Cool. What else is new?” and you laugh at yourself for building it up so much (when you’re nervous about it… that passes after a certain number of attempts).
Metrosexuals for the most part just confuse me. And I don’t mean “metrosexuals” like you. Wearing what is thought to be stylish clothing doesn’t make someone metro in my book. I mean like guys that are way more flaming and flambuoyant than me (not that that’s an accomplishment) and they tip my gaydar off so much for a “straight” guy that I can’t stand it. Last one I met I’d bet money he’s at least bi or has tendencies whether he denies it or just keeps it hidden. Not that there’s something wrong with that, I can’t help but feel bothered by it. I don’t really have a problem with anyone ‘metrosexual’, but sometimes you just can’t fool gaydar. It’s extra funny because people don’t really assume I’m gay… Covert gaydar or something.
I’m amazed at how folks will air their drama for everyone to see. My best friend tells his customers EVERYTHING at work and he wonders why there’s all these rumors going round about him. He does have some juicy and unflattering gossip flying around, and the sad truth is that a lot of it is true. I just don’t get the mentality of having to have everyone up in your business.
Co-worker: So, like, are you gay?
Me: Ooookay…
Co-worker: You’re really gay?!
Me: Ummm… yeah, dude.
LITERALLY TEN SECONDS LATER!
Girl co-worker:…
Me: What? …
Girl co-worker: puts hand on my shoulder You’re really gay?! (REALLY friggin loud too)
Me: Yeah…how did you…spots my co-worker running behind the scenes
Girl: It’s okay, I like both ways myself. :wgrin:
Me:
I don’t know, Whoopi’s pretty funny. Gaia seems like she’d be a downer at a party. She’d probably make you use regular dishes instead of plastic and make you wash them in some damn river or something. Bitch.
Anyway, I was totally zoned out at work last night cause I didn’t get much sleep, I got bad allergies, and the medication was kicking my ass. So of course that means the dude I got a bad crush on just HAD to show up. I was taking three orders at once when he came up and for a split second I actually didn’t even recognize him. Ugh.
I really hope it goes well for you, especially with your birthday coming up and all. Hopefully that’ll make them think a bit more about it before they make any snap decisions or say something they’ll regret. Good luck, seriously. I’m rootin’ for ya.
When I told my parents, my mom looked at me like I’d just hit her in the head with a hammer. She hasn’t talked to me about it since. My dad kinda stammered a few words and just looked lost, which is honestly pretty much normal, with just a little more emphasis on looking lost. He hasn’t brought it up, either. My brother’s cool with it, if not a bit uncomfortable… but he’s all I got, so I’m glad at least someone’s in my corner.
Dunno what my friends think… at least the ones who still give a shit. I do know that at least 3 of them are cool with me, and I’ve probably destroyed someone else unintentionally by telling them. The others just kinda avoid the subject, or more recently, avoid me. Funny thing is, a lot of people just give me the “Oh I kinda knew!” and I’m like “Well Godammit, why didn’t you let me know so I could stop confusing myself?”.
I’m still dealing with this, and it’s been a very rough patch for awhile now.
I wanna cool nickname but I can’t think of one at the moment. :wonder:
Yeah, I don’t mind most people’s reactions but I hate when they have a look on their face like something has changed (for the worst). Attention retard - I’ve been gay the whole fucking time. Now that I tell you doesn’t mean I’m gonna start hitting on you. You’re not my type at all anyway, even if you were gay. Which I can already tell if you are or aren’t.
I can’t really think of many times this has happened to me personally though, I’m good at knowing who to tell I guess. It’s really funny how natural it is for people to assume one is heterosexual. On several occasions, actually almost every time I’ve come out to friends on AIM that I know irl, I end up coming out to at least two people at once by just telling one person. They don’t believe me so they IM someone else, “Elias is really gay? what?” and then the other person had no idea either so they’re like “huh??” and then sometimes they don’t believe me some more. Like… why would I just like pretend to come out to someone? Haha. I have a weird sense of humor but never anything like that.
One thing that’s been happening a lot to me lately is people all tripped out over their 10 year age difference in their relationship and all I can do is sit back and be like “Dude, that’s nothing!”
Dude let me know if you need a points card I’ve got a spare one we can get some Puzzlefighter and hyperfighting matches going.
Dude… you are totally Usagi Yojimbo. Totally.
At least you got your brother dude. It’s so rough without family by your side.
Yeah… what always amazes me is how the Crackheads, hoes, teenage mothers and out and out theives and jailbirds in my family are quick to disaprove of me being gay and have the nerve to tell me how dissapointed God is in my behavior. … uhmm… didn’t you just get found in the staircase smokin crack? but because your straight god thinks you are a okay right? whatever I won’t get started on that we all know were conversation like this goes. But it is annoying to say the least.
It seems like you’ve been pretty lucky with your comming out to your buds man.
I’m glad too… cause i remember when you were on the fence about how to come out …now look at you … got a boyfriend and moving out… getting hit on and shit… the ghey is strong in you little one.
Most of these guys know my story. I lost everything when i came out. Everything Everyone. Even the guy i was “seeing” (my football coach) at the time wasn’t around to help me through it. My parents didnt’ want anything to do with my my sister and her husband rallyed members of the church group to try and even get violent against me. She did this by telling them to watch there sons, telling them that i’m a pedophile and so on. All baseless claims… even at my horniest i’d never do it with a child. Extended family aunts and uncles and so on even tried to “set traps” for me by inviting me places so that I could get beat up by the family. Which by the way is the stupidest thing ever… your gonna beat the gay outta me HAHAHAHAHA!!! Idiots.
I was lucky in some way though cause i had been making a decent living since 15 and I knew i wanted to move out so i could afford rent on my own at 17 when i got 86’d from the family. But emotionally I don’t think anything that could’ve prepared me for that level of abandonment… it was just so, complete.
I’ll write it all out one day and post it (just now remembering that i promised to do that a while ago) I will I will real soon.
i’m glad you have that attitude. that’s crucial. My comming out was insanely rough to deal with until i got to that point. Till i figured out **I’ve got to be me and if they are going to be unreasonable they are going to be that way weather you are there and begging for there acceptance or not. So better to just live your life till they work out there issues **
Rob: Yeah, I’m down. I’ve gotta download PF again though (already got it on PS3), but we should definitely get some games in at some point. I got a headset too, so yeah.
I hear you on the family that only cares about money bit. Infact that’s why alot of them are starting to come around now. but fuck them. I have no problem helping anyone if i belive they deserve it. I feel alot of them would take advantage of my good nature.
Like wise… alot of you guys help me through tough shit without even realizing it and belive me when i say i love you all for it. Sometimes shit will happen to me and i’ll be like wow this is kinda what LS or IWST was talking about the other day… or I’ll see a guy and be like that’s totally one of dljoes boys… or i’ll see a fat girl and think man warlock would love that.
Or conversations with Pigo, Stewie or Shotokan symphony, valaris … talking with my little brothers Azagoth, Dljoe… random fun shit with B.O.D, mech, yas. Sometimes you guys help me get through the roughest days.
bottom line is I love you guys shout out to all of you group bearhugs <- Including the straight guys.