Here’s the first part of my latest comic. Valin #20.
Hey. I know it’s a helluva cheesy but that’s just where the storys at at the mo’. Mike (The Main mute guy) I finally getting closer to Crystal after 18 or so issues so hopefully fans of the comic (Or the few that are left, it’s been awhile) will be stoked.
http://img217.exs.cx/img217/3797/faith1aweb1za.jpg
So wadda think?
Crits, comments, comdemnations are all welcome
I like the writing man. Page transition very well. On the first panel it looks like the focus should be the notepad, so I would move the camera to the right a little. Are the texts what he’s writing in his notepad? I’d tell you more but I am no expert at panelling.
Your’e right he’s writing the stuff in the panels. Good call about the first panel but it’ll make more sense when you see the whole page since the this top line mirrors a little to the line of panels undernear for a smoother transistion.
Thanks though. 
Full page one.
Here’s the finishedish first page, I’m really humming and harring about the background though.
http://img40.exs.cx/img40/8021/faith01web8zm.jpg
Hummmmmmm… Haaarrrrrr…
not bad… pretty cool
the lady’s hands are a tad large. Think slim and slender (but don’t overdo it) when drawing women’s fingers & hands. Her neck seems like she’s straining, perhaps if you didn’t emphasize her trapezius (sp?) muscles?
colours are a bit strong… try destaurating your image a bit.
upload more when you have them
Yeah man I got a thing for necks. I always end up drawing my ladies with long thin necks. I think I also may have her head jutted out too much.I got a bit lazy with her hands I think.
The colors was a bit of a wierd one. I’ve made another version of it now. It’s hard to beat the pavement artist out of me.
Thanks for all the tips Rook.
I’ll post the next page which I’m coloring at the moment. I have to warn you. This issue of the comic comes with a level ten cheese warning. It’s all a bit lovey dovey. But it’ll have some funny stuff too.